The Space Between
by AshesAshes83
Summary: After twelve years away, Bella's best childhood friend reappears in her life and turns her world upside down. Is Edward the same boy she secretly fell in love with all those years ago, or has his big life changed him in even bigger ways? This story consists of short chapters that are rated R-M for adult themes, bad language, and dry, sometimes raunchy, humor-possible lemons.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Chapter Notes:

Hello and thank you for choosing to read this story. It's going to be great-I promise.

The song for this chapter is Pepper by Butthole Surfers.

Link: watch?v=dFC4gecLfkA

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

When Bella discovers her old best friend is moving back to town, she grows nostalgic for a time that has long since passed and begins to wonder what might have been.

Without further adieu. . . .

One

The first time I laid eyes on Edward Cullen, I was eleven years old. I watched from my bedroom window as he and his brother carried boxes out of a large U-Haul. His perfect family moved next door to my imperfect family the summer after fifth grade, and life was never the same.

The first time I _met_ Edward Cullen, was at my older brother's high school football game. Emmett, his older brother, had joined the Varsity team shortly after moving in. During their home games, Edward and I were shoved together simply because the grown-ups didn't know what else to do with us.

Pittance from our parents came in the form of dollars and change. Edward and I would meet under the bleachers, pool our respective hauls, and hit the concession stand. Over grape slushes, music, and two very severe cases of youngest child syndrome, Edward and I formed a bond as we wandered through life in the wake of our older sibling's accomplishments.

Our circumstantial beginning grew into real friendship, and we spent nearly every day of the next six years being best friends. It was easier and more comfortable to be around Edward than it was any of the girls I knew, but aside from a few isolated kissing experiments in ninth grade-no tongue-things between us were never sexual.

Throughout middle school and high school, Edward and I didn't belong anywhere in particular which was fine with me. We fit in with each other; the two of us were merely interested in making it through each grade alive. Over the years, I got to know what life was like as the highly overshadowed youngest member of a family that hailed from a long line of college football stars. Edward trusted me with his thoughts, his dreams, and his darkest secrets. Our souls were clones.

Until senior year, when I finally learned the wonders of mascara, I was plain as they come; not the type to be in the running for Spring Queen by any means. But Edward had a way of making me feel like it was okay to be me-like it was _good_ to be me-no matter what. Although I wasn't pretty or popular, I was unremarkable enough to remain under the radar and escape public humiliation of any kind. That wasn't the case for Edward. He was often picked on for being quiet, skinny, and smarter than everyone else.

Despite what anyone said, it was easy for me to see the potential he had. Under all the layers of floppy hair and tattered flannel shirts, Edward was handsome. His good looks, intelligence, and humor were natural, and I knew someday the girls would flock to him in droves.

Edward was always there for me: when his brother picked on me, when _my_ brother's success kept my mom from noticing me, and even when Nick Delany tried going to third base without my permission on graduation night.

I remember it clearly. The party was winding down, and Nick and I were making out against the hood of his mom's station wagon. His virgin hands became eager for more and were trying to find their way down the front of my pants. I tried pushing him away, but he wouldn't relent. Edward came out of nowhere and tackled Nick to the ground with fists flying.

As he wailed and flailed and beat Nick to a bloody pulp, I fell head-over-heels in love with Edward Cullen-an emotion I buried that night and carried with me for the next twelve years. Still, he knew me like no one else did, and I was never alone when he was around.

Eventually, all good things come to an end. Life happens and circumstances change. When my acceptance letter from Princeton never came, I knew it was the end of an era. Edward's family had been attending Princeton for over a hundred years. While his brother, Emmett, was the resident football star, Edward still had to go. And he _wanted_ to go. Princeton was an incredible opportunity for him. We'd planned on attending together, but I didn't have the SAT scores Edward did, and my mom didn't have the financial pull of the Cullen family. Not that they needed it for him. Edward was a genius.

At first, he was pissed; he refused to go without me. I told him he was being ridiculous. He had an opportunity to live out our dream and move across the continent. It was necessary, I informed him, that he experienced true freedom for the both of us. As the last summer we would spend together slipped through our fingers, Edward grew anxious and more excited to leave.

I consider every moment up to the point where Edward left for college to be my childhood. That being said, on the last night of my childhood, as Edward and I said goodbye, he promised it wasn't the end. Christmas was only a few months away, and he'd be home to visit and tell me all about life on the East Coast.

That night, we sat on the roof of his dad's tool shed, like so many summer nights before, in a farewell of silence. I held back my tears and tried to be encouraging, but neither of us could look the other in the eye. It was after midnight when Edward was finally summoned by his mother, and we walked slowly through the gap that separated our houses. I was surprised when he wrapped me in a tight hug, but I didn't hesitate to lock my arms around his back and bury my face against his shoulder.

Just as I turned to head home, Edward pulled me close, grabbed my face, and kissed me. I mean, _really_ kissed me. I didn't even have time to register that my dreams were coming true before he pulled away, gave me a dazed, crooked grin, and took off for his house.

When he left the next day and I realized I wouldn't see him again until the holidays, my world grew a little darker. Two weeks later, it shattered completely. I sat in the middle of our cul-de-sac, crying like a child as the moving van drove out of sight. Dr. Cullen, Edward's father, had accepted the position of lead surgeon at Northwestern Memorial Hospital in Chicago. He was moving his family to Illinois, and I would never see Edward again.

I don't know how long I sat there on the hard concrete before my mom pulled me off my ass with a stern but worried look. After all, I hadn't even acted that crazy when Edward himself left. But she didn't understand. Edward left with the promise of a return. And in my mind, the kiss we shared was also the promise of something more for us. Instead, the Cullens had taken those promises, packed them into brown boxes, and moved them 2,063 miles _away_ from Seattle, taking the last shred of my childhood with them.

"Swan! I need those damage reports emailed within the hour. Evans rescheduled the meeting, and I'm in a world of shit."

I nod at my boss with half a bagel sticking out of my mouth and go to work on his request. He merely rolls his eyes in contempt before moving on.

"I see your boss is in another one of his glorious moods," Alice muses with wry. "Honestly, Bella, why do you put up with it?"

Ah, Alice. She has it made in the shade with her young, fun boss and a company-paid Mustang at her disposal. Alice Brandon is well on her way to being the operations manager of our company's PR department, and all it took was brains, moxy, and a healthy respect for brown-nosing.

Any time I look at her and feel a pang of envy, I think of all the ass-kissing that has to be done in order to receive the perks. No thanks; my dignity and I are just fine being the rug underneath the ladder of success. I'm the administrative assistant to the CFO's right hand man at Voss Butler, a large financial corporation. When my boss says jump, my usual response is, "How high, sir?"

Alice's eyebrows have almost made it to her hairline, waiting for me to answer.

"What am I supposed to say to him? Run your own damn reports? I'm his assistant, Alice. It's my job to do his job," I say and toss the rest of my breakfast in the trash.

Alice gives me _the eyebrow_; she's not impressed. "Whatever. You could easily be sitting in his chair, doing the job ten times better than he ever could. The man wouldn't be able to function without you, and he's taking credit for your hard work, Bella."

"Can we _not_ do this today? Now, either tell me about what happened with Big Shiny last night, or go back to your own department. Do I have to put my ear buds in and ignore you altogether?" I ask, knowing the mention of Alice's busy love-life will be diversion enough to take her mind off my career shortcomings and 'lack of drive'.

It works like a charm, and I'm able to concentrate on my work while Alice babbles on about the incredibly sexy, slightly dense model she is currently sleeping with. Our nickname for the poor bastard, Big Shiny, is ridiculous, I know. But that's how Alice described his junk after their first night together_, _and it just stuck. His real name is Lucas ... or is it Logan? Either way, it doesn't matter. She's off my back, and I'll be able to get my work done and go home on time for once.

I can hear my cell phone going crazy in my purse, but my arms are too overloaded with groceries to do anything about it. Dear old mom will just have to converse with my voicemail this time. As I struggle to balance everything and get my key in the lock, I hear the house phone begin to ring. I finally manage to open the door just as the answering machine picks up.

"Hey, Bella. It's me, Edward. I've tried calling your cell but can't seem to get you. You know I hate talking to machines so call me back when-"

"Wait!" I yell, dropping my bags to the floor in the middle of the foyer and diving for the phone. I catch him just as he's ending his message. "Edward Cullen, you've called me precisely four times a year for the last ten years. To what do I owe the great pleasure of this random, middle of June phone call?" I'm grinning from ear-to-ear.

Edward's laugh is deep and boyish, just as I remember it. He really does hate answering machines, and I can tell he's embarrassed to have been interrupted mid-message. "You're screening my calls now? Is that what our friendship has come to?" he asks, and I can almost hear his grin through the phone.

"Sorry, you caught me just getting in the door. How've you been?" I ask, cradling the phone against my ear as I pick up groceries off the floor.

"Well, pretty great, actually. So much has been happening, and I guess I'll just spit it out. I've accepted a job at Dean & Crater. I'm leaving Chicago."

His news is certainly a surprise, but in my haste to get to the phone, several eggs tumbled out of their carton, and I'm mopping up the mess with a kitchen towel before the cat beats me to it. "Really? Wow, that's huge. Where are you going?" I ask, tossing the goop-coated dishrag into the trash.

"It all happened so fast; I might be leaving as soon as this weekend. And, Bella ... Dean & Crater is the largest architecture firm in Seattle. We're going to be neighbors again." With egg running down my arm, I freeze like an idiot in the middle of the kitchen, too stunned to speak. Edward doesn't skip a beat. "I can't wait to see you again. God, I can't believe it's been _twelve years._ That's crazy to me! Is it crazy to you?"

"Crazy," I repeat, stupefied with shock. Our irregular stream of emails has made the space between us seem less grand, but he's right; twelve years is a long time. I've only even seen Edward in a handful of pictures over the last decade.

"Bella, you're being awfully quiet."

I smack my forehead, effectively clearing the fog. "I'm stunned! Edward, this is great news! Congratulations. I had no idea you were even looking for a new job."

Now that I've yanked my jaw off the floor and can speak again, the conversation returns to normal ... well, normal with a giant edge of excitement. Edward gives me the details about his decision to leave the firm he's been at for the last three years when Dean & Crater offered him a position. He was noticed by the architectural mega-house because of his incredible reputation with skyscrapers. Edward will resume his life in Seattle as head of their board of advisors, and I couldn't be more proud.

We talk and reminisce late into the evening before finally saying goodnight. As I lay in bed and stare at the glowing numbers on my alarm clock, I think only about Edward. Time has stolen the better of our friendship, and we have so much to relearn about each other. The prospect of living in the same city again fills me with excitement, nerves, and most surprising of all, immense hope.

Between the phone calls and emails, or after a particularly heinous date, I would think a lot about Edward. I've often wondered what would've become of us if fate hadn't stepped in all those years ago. And I will _never_ forget how his eighteen-year-old lips felt against mine the night we said goodbye.

I finally doze off, thinking about grape slushes, long summer nights, and my first real love.

Chapter End Notes:

Squee! Edward's coming back into the picture, and everything is going to be perfect ... right? I hope you'll stick around to find out. Thanks for reading everyone, and please leave me a review.

Thank you, Alice's White Rabbit, for giving this chapter a good polishing, and to Discordia for taking the time to pre-read. You ladies are the best!

I'll see you all next time, and don't forget to leave me your thoughts!


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Chapter Notes:

Hello again! Thank you to everyone who gave this little ditty a chance. I hope you enjoy this chapter, and PLEASE leave me a review!

The song for this chapter is Cannon Ball by The Breeders, and here's a link:

watch?v=60iwPHAoqk8

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Two

"So, Casanova has returned from the past, huh? When do I get to meet him?" Alice inquires, poking at the onion in her dry martini.

I finish off my second Merlot and welcome the lovely bliss that comes along with two glasses of wine. "Keep saying things like that, and the answer is never. Edward just got into town a few days ago; I haven't even heard from him yet." Alice gives me a look, and I give her one right back, putting an end to the conversation.

Tonight is supposed to be about having fun, but the more I look around, the less that seems possible. With a gun to my back, I'm attending The Seattle Group's annual benefit to recognize the top grossing charities in the city. Our company handled the budgeting for the event, and several of the bigwigs were invited to attend. The only reason I'm here is because Big Shiny-Alice's flavor of the month-had to jaunt off to France at the last minute, and Alice needed a date. As the almost-head of public relations, Alice is a networking junkie. She batted her eyelashes until the breeze it created blew the invitation right out of her boss's hand.

She twisted my arm all week until I finally agreed to be her plus-one. But just when I'd started to believe that, yes, it might be nice to attend one of these things without having to be my boss's slave for the evening, I spotted him. From across the room, Mr. Prazan, my boss, sought me out like a heat-seeking missile. After getting his drink order, I kindly reminded him that I was off the clock and told him to have a good time before Alice and I booked it to the bar. She's right; the man can't function without me.

Alice remains quiet for once, and I look around for a waiter. My mind turns to Edward without warning, and I stupidly resume the conversation. "It's a lot, you know-moving halfway across the country. He just needs a little time to get acclimated."

"I guess," Alice says, rolling her eyes. She winks at me with a genuine smile, and I'm glad to see the Alice I love so much. She shrugs her narrow shoulders. "I just want to meet the guy, B. After all the hype, I'm half expecting Jesus Christ himself to show up." I laugh at her despite myself, and she looks past me with a groan. "Crap, I've been spotted."

"Bob again?"

With a large, fake smile, Alice wiggles her fingers at someone behind me. "Worse-Donnelly." Oh, no. Max Donnelly is Alice's boss's boss, and he's had a thing for my friend since the day she moved upstairs from personnel. Neither of us can stand the guy, but she's pressured to kiss his ass at every given opportunity. He knows it and derives a sick pleasure from her feigned interest in him. Alice stands up and smooths her dress, grabbing her drink. "You find us a new location; I'll meet you in ten minutes."

I wish her luck and order another Merlot when the waiter finally appears. I bring my drink with me and find a cozy little table for two that's still close to the bar. Leaning back in my seat, I scan the room and watch the crowd. People-watching has always been fascinating to me, but I'm also on constant lookout for Prazan. He can get his own gin tonight.

A short while later, just as the lights dim and a spotlight focuses on a podium in the distance, there's a tap on my shoulder. I set my drink down and sigh; my boss knows no bounds. I turn around, but instead of Mr. Prazan's expectant glare, a man in an Armani suit is smiling down at me. He's the definition of young urban professional, but there's something slightly _off_ about that smile; like he's trying to be smug, but it just doesn't suit him.

"May I sit down?" he asks, and something odd happens to his eyebrows. I'm not sure what to make of him. He's cute for all intents and purposes-really cute, actually. But the kind of suave he's trying to portray is well beyond his means.

"Actually, I'm waiting for someone," I say, calm, polite, and ready to tell him to take a hike.

He ignores me and helps himself to Alice's seat. "I'm Jasper. And your name must be Angel, because I've never seen anything so beautiful this side of heaven."

"Oh, um, thanks. That's ... that's awkward," I mutter. Did he just say that? My ears burn with the stupid blush that only comes around when it has the opportunity to make an awkward situation worse. I'm so embarrassed for the man that I can hardly look him in the eye. I force myself to anyway, and he isn't the least bit phased.

Mr. Big Stuff takes out a business card and slides it across the table. "I spotted you and your friend from across the room, and I must say, I'm intrigued," he says, brushing his fingers over mine as he stares at my brilliantly displayed tits. I could kick myself for letting Alice talk me into wearing this dress over the blue one, even if it was way too short on me. I cross my arms, and he finally manages to look me in the eye. "Listen, my friend is in the restroom right now, but if the two of you would like to meet us at the bar for a drink ... well, that would be just swell."

His smarmery almost makes me laugh, and I have to bite my tongue to hold it in. He's certainly not my type, and I'm pretty sure Alice would destroy him. It's time to set the record straight for the poor chump. I slide the business card back across the table without looking at it. "Listen, Jasper. I know you're trying really hard, and I'm sure you're a fun guy, but I just don't see this going anywhere," I tell him, gesturing between the two of us. I'm being nice now, but I'm prepared to pounce if necessary.

Jasper looks confused. "So ... that's a no?"

I nod my head and tsk with feigned regret. "That's a hard pass. Sorry."

Before Jasper can reply, Alice reappears and begins chattering away without so much as glancing at him. "God, that was close. Get a load of this: Donnelly's on my tail, trying to invite me back to his housefor cocktails, when his _wife_ shows up. Boy, was he surprised. Apparently, he thought she was in Aspen. What a colossal douche," she says with a laugh. Alice cocks her head in Jasper's direction. "Who's this?"

Now that Jasper has crammed his tongue back into his mouth, he's finally able to speak. "Holy lips, legs, tits, and ass," he mumbles under his breath and stands up to give Alice his seat. "Please, let me buy you a drink."

Alice stares at him as if he's just offered her a shit sandwich and looks back at me. "Is he joking? Let's get out of here. I've had enough of this place."

Thank _God_. I gather my wrap from the chair next to me and, in the process, manage to knock my purse on the floor at just the right angle, and it explodes on impact. With a muttered curse, I drop to my knees and crawl under the table to gather my belongings. My wallet, the _one_ thing I care about, is lying on its side under Alice's chair, and I have to get on my stomach to reach it.

Jasper is still giving it the old college try with Alice, but she hasn't given him an inch. As I stuff everything back into my clutch, I can see that a third pair of feet has joined the party. _Well done, Swan. You've drawn a crowd._

"Excuse me, I'm sorry to interrupt. Jasper, shouldn't we get back to the table? The speeches have started."

My heart ceases in my chest; I would know that voice anywhere. The impact of my head hitting the table sends colored streaks of light across my vision. I don't know whether to jump out from under the table and hug him, or just stay where I am and hide in my shame. The tablecloth lifts in front of me, and Alice's head appears in the gap.

"Bella, what the hell are you doing down there?" she demands in a loud whisper.

My heart is hammering inside my chest, and I can't produce an answer. Instead, I put my head down and slowly crawl out from under the table, emerging inches from the shiniest pair of loafers I've ever seen. As I stand up, my eyes rake up Edward's body, toes to eyes. I stare at him in wonder while everyone else looks at me like I belong in an institution.

In a matter of seconds, Edward's face has turned from one of caution to one of recognition and shock. Laughing, he squints his eyes and his thick eyebrows pull together in the middle of his perfect forehead. "Bella?"

I can't even speak. Before I even realize it, I'm wrapped in his arms and it feels so good. Fuck me, he smells amazing. His deep chuckles rumble against me, and he pulls back. Holding me at arm's length, Edward's eyes sweep over me, and I can't help but do the same. Edward grew up, and he grew up right. He's broader than I remember, but still tall and lean. His face is a work of art with just the right amount of stubble blanketing his defined jaw. I want to run my fingers over it, and without thinking about it, I do.

"My God, Bella, you look incredible," he said, shaking his head again and laughing at the coincidence of being in the same place at the same time after all these years.

"So do you," I tell him, and in my mind, singing cartoon birds have landed on his shoulder and dreamy violins are playing in the background. I barely register Alice's impatient huff as she waits to be introduced. I'm too far gone to notice anything else but him. "You look ... beautiful." Ugh, whydo I suck at life?

There aren't enough shades of red for my face to turn, but Edward laughs it off. "I can't believe I'm running into you here," he says, as if in a daze. He finally remembers himself and gestures to his friend. "This is my business partner, Jasper Whitlock; we'll be working together a lot. He thought it would be a good idea for me to get to know the scene." Edward is still as flabbergasted as I am. "What are _you_ doing here?"

I mentally punch myself in the face and snap back to reality. "I'm here with my friend Alice."

Alice sticks her hand out and gives Edward's a firm shake. "Alice Brandon, public relations, Voss Butler. And you are?" Edward gives the strange little girl in front of him an odd look, and turns to me with an amused, questioning smile.

"Alice, quit networking. _This_ is Edward," I tell her, and her eyes go wide before she narrows them at my old friend.

"You're Edward Cullen?" she asks.

"I am."

"_The_ Edward Cullen?"

"I think so."

"The one Bella's mentioned at least once a day for the last five years?"

"Uh ..."

"Alice, for God's sake," I scold and turn to Edward with an embarrassed gulp of laughter. "Ignore her. Actually, I think we were just leaving. Do you want to get out of here?"

Edward flashes a brilliant smile, and his eyes are even greener than I remember-verdant and alive. "Yeah, definitely. I mean, I _think_. I don't know if I can leave." He turns to his overzealous co-worker. "Jasper, would you mind if I call it a night here? Bella's an old friend," he says, trying for subtlety.

Jasper gives him an exaggerated wink and sizes Alice up for the umpteenth time. "Absolutely, let's blow this popsicle stand. I know a great bar across town. I hope you ladies like jazz music. I'll go get our jackets, Eddie." And with that, he's gone.

We're all speechless, but Edward is the first to break the silence. "I'm so sorry about this. I work with the guy; I don't think it would be right to ditch him. Do you mind? Unless you want to do this some other night-I totally understand."

So, Edward still rambles when he's nervous. I always thought it to be such an endearing quality. "No, I don't mind at all ... as long as Alice goes with us," I say, turning to her with eyes that plead for my life.

Alice glares at me with tightly pursed lips but smiles at Edward. "Trust me, Eddie-"

"It's Edward," he corrects with a chuckle.

"Trust me, Edward, I would love nothing more than to sit down and pick your brain all night long. And at some point, I shall do just that. But I'm afraid I have an early morning, and I really must go."

Smiling, I excuse us and drag her aside by the elbow. "You are doing this for me, Mary Alice Brandon," I inform her through clenched teeth and tight lips.

Alice removes her elbow from my grip and straightens her dress. "I most certainly am not. Edward seems great, but you're on crack if you think I'm spending one more minute with Captain Insane-O. I have vibrators more compelling than that guy."

"Hey," I snap back, pointing my finger in her face. "Do you realize how many _Captain Insane-O's_ I've endured over the years? You owe me at least this much. One hour, then you can go home," I say. Alice juts her chin ever so slightly and crosses her arms. She's not budging. Damn it, my bitch reserve has been exhausted, and I resort to desperation. "Please, please, please, please," I whisper frantically and throw in my most shameless wounded-puppy face for extra measure.

She quirks her mouth to the side and exhales dramatically. "One hour, _only_ because it's Edward, and this makes us even. Got it?" I squeeze her shoulders and almost squeal my delight until Alice reminds me to contain myself.

"We're in," I say, turning back to Edward.

"Great!"

I grab my wrap and stick my clutch securely in the crook of my arm. Jasper returns, and he and Edward put their coats on. "Are you familiar with Dimitriou's?" he asks Alice, doing that weird thing with his eyebrows again.

Alice sighs, resigned to her fate. "I've been there before. We'll meet you in twenty minutes."

Edward looks at me with a dapper smile. "Twenty minutes," he says, and they turn and disappear into the crowd.

Chapter End Notes:

Thanks for reading! Stay tuned for next week's addition of The Space Between *snort*

Thank you to Alice's White Rabbit for being a superb beta, and also to Discordia for pre-reading like a champ.

Big thanks to my VB, devilsgenie.

See you next time! Please review!


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Chapter Notes:

Hi, gang! Back again with another chapter.

I'll keep this brief. The song for this chapter is another 90's classic, Cantaloop by US3. It goes perfectly with the Jazz theme of the evening. Here's the link:

watch?v=JwBjhBL9G6U

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Three

Edward and Jasper disappear into the crowd, and Alice leans into me. "Holy shit, Bella. Just ... _wow_. I'm actually mad that Edward is off limits to me." I laugh, and Alice takes me by the hand and leads the way out. After a pit stop at the ladies room, we head out of the banquet hall and through the grand lobby of the Edgewater Hotel. "You _do_ realize you told Edward he was beautiful, don't you?" Alice continues with a snicker as we walk out into the damp, chilly night.

My shoulders slump. "God, I know. Why do I turn into such a spaz whenever I'm nervous?"

Alice hands the parking attendant her ticket and he radios a valet to deliver the car. She pulls out her compact and studies her face as she answers my rhetoric. "The same reason you trip over your feet ten times a day and put ketchup on everything. It's just who you are." Her car appears, and I climb into the passenger side of Alice's Mustang, failing to come up with a valid argument. She slides in and gives the car some gas. "Here," she says, reaching into her bag and tossing me the first things she can grab onto. "Make yourself beautiful for lover boy."

"What the hell is this?" I ask, holding up a makeup-stained Q-tip and a tube of mascara. "I'll tell you what this is; this is disgusting. Who do I look like? MacGyver?" Alice ignores my snark, and I shut up long enough to apply a fresh coat of black goop to my already smoky eyes. Thank God, Edward caught me at my best and not running errands on a Sunday morning. My frumpy grey sweats leave quite a bit to the imagination.

It's not long before we're pulling into the crowded lot at Dimitriou's, the upscale jazz club favored by the locals. Alice kills the engine, and I step out of the car, carefully adjusting the black Versace dress she let me borrow for the evening. I check once more to make sure my boobs are secured behind the thin fabric that splits in a V down my chest. Yep, the girls are locked and loaded.

Alice talks to me from over her shoulder as we make our way to the entrance. "I am giving you an hour and a half tops before I split. If you want to join me, great; if not, that's your call. Capisce?"

"Understood. Maybe we can ditch the dodo at some point and go back to my apartment."

Alice pulls the glass door open for me, and the rhythm of a steel guitar flows out onto the street. "We shall see," she purrs.

It doesn't take long for us to spot Edward. He must've been watching the door, and I see him waving at us from a booth in the corner. He and Jasper stand when we approach, and I smile when he opens his arms to me again. I find what already feels like my perfect nook and wrap my arms around his back.

"It's so good to see you. You look absolutely amazing," he murmurs into my hair, and for one hot second, I think I'm literally going to swoon. I want to tell him that he looks good too, but I think I already got my point across on that earlier.

Edward ushers Alice and me into one side of the booth and slides in across from us next to his new business partner. A waitress comes right away, and we go around the table with our orders. Edward orders a highball, and I feel like a rebel, switching from wine to vodka. Some occasions just call for a Grey Goose straight up, and that's all I'm going to say about it.

The waitress is quick to return with our drinks, and Jasper leans forward after taking a sip of his Jameson. "Let's start over, shall we? We didn't have the chance for introductions earlier, so I'll go first. I'm Jasper, but my closest friends call me Jaz." He looks pointedly at Edward, as if seeking reassurance that they're well on their way to becoming best buddies.

"I'm not calling you Jaz," Edward states quickly and very matter-of-factly. It's all I can do to stifle my snort.

Jasper continues, unperturbed. "Edward, how did we get lucky enough to be sitting across from God's most perfect creatures? Tell me again: how does everyone know everyone?" he says, his eyes on Alice.

Edward looks at me, and for a split second, there's something marring his happiness. Regret, perhaps. He shakes his head but doesn't look away. "Well, Bella and I were neighbors as kids. We sort of grew up together. Actually, she's my best friend."

I am lost in him. His eyes hold me in place, and Alice throws an elbow into my ribs to get me to wake the fuck up. "Say something," she says through a tight smile.

"Neighbors ... we grew up together," I murmur. Why do I have to be so goddamn awkward? I have to tear my eyes away from Edward so I can concentrate on my words. "And Alice and I met when I was hired on at Voss Butler. We've been great friends ever since. What about you and Jasper? Did you two know each other before you started working together?"

"No, Jasper and I met my first day in town. He'll be my mentor, so to speak, until I get my feet wet."

"Does Dean & Crater know about this?" Alice asks, dry and deadpan.

Jasper smiles and accepts the challenge that was never offered in the first place. "Shortcake, if you want to go somewhere in this town, you just give me a call. Let Uncle Jasper take care of you."

Alice straightens her posture and looks at me, repulsed. "I can't even ..." She pushes me down the booth until I'm forced to stand up. "I'm going to the ladies room, you coming?"

"No, I'll stay," I tell her. With my back to the guys, I mouth the words _be nice._

"Whatever." Alice saunters away, and I take my seat again with an apologetic chuckle.

"I think I'll go have a drink at the bar," Jasper says, his eyes following Alice's every move as she makes her way across the club. He's off without another word.

Edward loosens his tie, and takes a long drink from his glass.

"What's with your friend? Is he always like this?"

Edward laughs with a shrug. "I have no idea. I just met him a few days ago, but I swear, he's been completely normal up until tonight. It's the weirdest thing. I guess the easiest explanation is that he's newly divorced and has no clue how to act around beautiful women."

Blushing, I stir the melting ice into my vodka. "Yeah, no kidding." We both look over at Jasper. He's already at the bar, trying out various poses for when Alice finally emerges and sees him. She'll be so pleased. I shake my head and laugh with sympathy. "Yikes, women are going to ruin him."

"I think they already have," Edward says with a chuckle and clears his throat. He seems nervous, but when he looks at me and sighs, all of his anxiety seems to melt away. "I can't believe I'm sitting across from you. After all this time, you're right here ... close enough to touch." Just as he says the words, his fingertips brush the side of my hand and every neuron in my body comes alive.

"I think it's great that you're back. Where did they end up moving you?"

Edward moans his response as he drains his Highball. "Sorry." He wipes at a drop of whiskey-flavored condensation from his chin, but it escapes and rolls under his jaw. I am captivated. "I'm in Ravenna right near the market, but I work over on the east side-Bellevue, actually. Do you know it?"

"Sure. I work on the east side, too-Kirkland. And I live in Hawthorne Hills; we're pretty close, actually. This is incredible. What are the odds you would end up back in Seattle after all?"

Edward sucks in a deep breath and draws his eyebrows in mock concentration. "Oh, pretty good, I would say." He chuckles at my confusion and shrugs his shoulders. "This place has been pulling at me since I left. I've wanted to come back for so long."

I stare into his eyes and try to see beyond any pretense, but there is none. "I had no idea."

"No ... you wouldn't have," he says with another light laugh as he studiously shreds a cocktail napkin into a pile under his fingertips. "Bella, I started showing interest in Dean & Crater years ago. I applied to their internship program my last year of college but didn't get picked. I've been sending them my resume every year since then. Until last year, that is."

I never knew of Edward's mission to return home, and his strange demeanor leads me to believe he'd purposefully kept me in the dark. How odd. I find my breath, but my voice is hardly above a whisper. "Why did you stop trying?"

Edward is silent for a long moment but finally runs a hand through his hair. I've seen the gesture a million times before and can't help but smile. He smiles back and reaches for my hand again. "I guess I just ... threw in the towel and gave up on that dream. I took all the years of rejection as a sign and realized I couldn't keep living in the past," he says. "Then, about a month ago, out of the blue, I got a call from Seattle, and here I am." He smirks at some undisclosed irony and shakes his head. "God, if I'd only known ..."

His unfinished sentence hangs between us, and I realize he doesn't intend to elaborate. I manage a smile, attempting to clear the cryptic atmosphere surrounding us. "They must've made an offer you couldn't refuse."

"They did, but ... there are other perks to living here," he says, holding my gaze. I have a million questions, but I'm too entranced by his eyes to voice them. Before we both get lost, Edward smiles and shrugs. "After all, I did meet Jasper."

I laugh and nudge his leg under the table with my foot. Thinking of Jasper makes me think of Alice, and I realize she's been in the bathroom for a while.

"Is everything all right?" Edward asks, following my searching gaze.

"Yeah, I'm just looking for Alice. I think I should go see if she's okay." I grab my purse and stand, taking one last drink.

Edward stands as well and takes a look around. His eyes focus on something across the room, and he smiles, nodding his head toward the other side of the bar. I lean over to peer around him and see Alice and Jasper chatting over a drink. Actually, they're more than chatting. They're having a real conversation, and she _doesn't_ have the look of death on her face.

I plop back down in the booth, stunned. "What just happened here?"

Edward gives me a sly grin and takes his seat. "I think your friend just got Jazzercised."

I giggle and shake my head. "Gross."

"Who knows? Like I said, he's been a cool guy up until now. Maybe he remembered to take his medication while Alice was in the restroom."

"He should take extra." My head is swimming in spirits as we giggle together. Well _I'm_ giggling. Men don't giggle.

We take advantage of the time alone to catch up. I ask Edward about his family, and a warm smile lights his face. His mom and dad are enjoying the retired life, and their favorite pastime is spoiling their grandchildren. Edward's older brother, Emmett, is now married with three little ones. He works for the Chicago Bears, but he stopped playing ball himself after college due to irreparable damage to his left knee.

I fill him in on my family, too. My mom finally retired last year, and she keeps herself busy teaching painting and sculpture at the Y. My older brother, Randy, lives in the Olympic Peninsula where he works as a game warden. At the mention of our siblings, we're soon reminiscing about the various pranks we would play on our brothers.

"Oh, the prank wars. How could I forget about the prank wars?" Edward says, scrubbing a hand over his face.

The impromptu wars always pitted the two of us against our brothers and usually ended with Edward suffering some form of punishment for our antics. We didn't always lose, though. Randy and Emmett may have been bigger and stronger than us, but Edward and I were quick, and we were clever. Every once in a while, the older siblings would show mercy on us, and we would all band together for what Edward and I referred to as mega-pranks. My own mother had no patience for our shenanigans, but Edward's mom, Esme, was an easy target. And she never _ever_ saw it coming.

"Mom still gets upset about the Christmas tree," Edward says, and I crack up, remembering our greatest prank ever.

Late one Christmas Eve, after the parents were asleep, the four of us met up in the gap between our houses and formulated a scheme to beat all others. Quickly and quietly, we carried Esme's perfectly decorated Christmas tree outside and hoisted it onto the roof. Emmett and Randy secured it in a holder and plugged in the lights while Edward and I ran laps to and from the house, handing them presents and decorations of every kind. Before long, the Cullen's entire Christmas morning was pieced perfectly together on top of their house.

"How in the hell did we pull that off?" I ask, wiping a tear from my eye. "I remember I woke up the next morning and looked out the window to see your mom in the front yard, wearing nothing but pajamas with snow up to her knees. I wanted to feel bad for making her cry, but come on. Even your dad laughed."

Edward snorts. "Yeah, after he stopped grounding us. Remember how he made Emmett and I pack up all the presents and take them down to the Salvation Army for donation. Man, we got nailed for that one, but I still say it was worth it. It just doesn't get more epic than that."

We're still laughing when Alice appears beside us. She gives Edward a warm smile and turns to me. "I'm clocking out now. It's late, and I need my six hours. Are you ready to go?"

Before I can answer, Edward intervenes. "Actually, Alice, I'd be happy to give her a ride. If that's okay with you, Bella."

"Yeah, that'd be great."

"All right; you be careful," Alice says to me. I stand to give her a hug, and she whispers into my ear, "I did this for you because I'm your bitch. And now, you are mine."

I mouth my thanks when she pulls away from me. Alice bids farewell to the boys and is gone in a flash. Jasper starts to pull his jacket on. "Well, that's that; I am officially in love. And I'm pretty sure the feeling is mutual."

Edward and I exchange a look behind his back, and I shake my head to indicate he couldn't be more wrong. Edward laughs and pulls out his wallet while I search for my cash. "It's on me, old friend," he says with a wink. "We'll drop Jasper off, and then you can show me where your building is."

"Sounds good. Thanks for the drinks."

We head through the crowd, and I melt into Edward's touch when he places a warm, guiding hand on the bare skin of my back.

Chapter End Notes:

And we're back. I hope you all enjoyed this week's chapter. Please leave me a review and let me know what you think. I've gotten some pretty great feedback so far, but I'd love to hear from all of you :D

Big thanks to my beta, Alice's White Rabbit. She is a special gal, and so very smart. Also, thank you to Discordia for pre-reading this mess. Love you both!

Devilsgenie is my VB and she is peaches.

Until next time!


	4. Chapter 4

Welcome back, friends! I hope everyone had a fun and SAFE Labor Day. I'd like to say thanks to everyone who is reading. Your reviews are amazing, and I'd love to hear from everyone. Your words mean the moon to me.

Are we ready to get down to business? Then gather around and sit a spell.

The song for this chapter is Island in the Sun by Weezer

Here's the link:

watch?v=mgAIWjP2P2U

See you on the other side!

Chapter Four

"Are you sure you can't come in for some coffee?" I ask, pulling my wrap tighter around my shoulders. It's unseasonably cold for June and my teeth chatter as we stroll across the parking lot to my apartment.

"I really want to, but Jasper is picking me up at 5:00 tomorrow morning to get to the airport," he says with regret.

I hate that he's leaving town again when he only just got here. "Well, we'll have to get together when you get back from L. A.," I tell him, and I hope my disappointment isn't showing too much.

"Absolutely, I'll be back on Thursday. I'm sure it's not your idea of fun, but I'd love for you to come over and keep me company while I do some unpacking. I've been living out of boxes for days now."

My eyes light up. "Of course, I'll even help. What time should you expect me?"

Pleased, Edward graces me with his signature smile. "Our plane lands at three, so I'm thinking ... six?"

"I'll bring dinner," I say with a nod, and we hike the three flights of stairs to my place. Once we reach the door, Edward leans in and wraps his arms around me. I hope he doesn't notice me inhaling his essence like a creeper.

He pulls back to look at me, and I shiver; partly because of the cold air that howls through the corridor around us, but mostly because of his proximity. His features are soft, his lips are close enough to kiss, and his eyes are filled with a longing that I'm certain mirrors my own.

A faint, whimsical smile plays at his lips. "After all this time, here you are."

I manage to pry my eyes away from his mouth and meet his fathomless, emerald gaze. "Here I am," I murmur. We stare at each other as our breaths collide in the cold air, but something about him is off. I can't figure out Edward's furtive expression, but I would happily spend all night trying to decipher its meaning.

"Goodnight, Bella," he whispers, and the spell is broken.

"Goodnight." I clear my throat to dispel the lump. "Have a safe trip."

"See you Thursday." And with that, Edward releases me and walks away.

Once he's down the hall and around the corner, I squeeze my eyes shut and wrap my arms around my torso. My inner diva is doing the Watusi, and I'm barely able to repress my squeal. Unlocking the door, I enter my apartment and kick off my heels.

Edward is back, and he's _gorgeous_-more so than I ever could have imagined. Floating around from room to room, I strip out of my dress and get to work de-whoring myself. All throughout my nightly routine, a fatuous smile remains plastered to my face. Once my body is a blank slate, I crawl under the covers and pull them up to my chin. I rarely have more than two drinks when Alice and I go out, but I outdid my limit by several tonight. Thanks to my enthusiasm with the bottle, I'm quick to fall asleep.

This week is a nightmare. The company is in the middle of an audit, and everyone is feeling the pressure. Prazan is in a mad rush to get the quarterly assessments together, which means _I'm_ in a mad rush to do the brunt of the work for him. Thank goodness the non-stop rush has made the time fly, and Thursday is finally upon me.

With a huge sigh of relief, I slip into Alice's car. I was able to finish all pressing matters before lunch, and Alice and I are now on our way to Murphy's, our favorite lunch spot, for an hour of freedom. She's fairly quiet on the way to the restaurant, and I know she's holding back, just waiting for the perfect moment to start hounding me.

I pretend not to notice her anticipation the entire journey, and when we park, Alice and I walk the short distance to the café in silence. There's a sparse crowd, and we're seated right away in our usual booth overlooking the marina. She crosses her arms and locks her blue eyes on me, but I pointedly ignore her and unroll my silverware, spreading the bright red napkin on my lap with care. I open my menu and begin to peruse the familiar lunch offerings.

Alice is nearly growling, and I can see her hunched over like an angry cat in my periphery. She finally reaches her limit. "Bella, you're killing me here! I know you're going out with Edward tonight; this needs to be thoroughly discussed. We only have-" Alice pauses to check her watch. "-forty-five minutes. Now spill."

I close the menu and put it aside with an indifferent sigh. "There's nothing to tell. We aren't even going out; I'm helping him unpack his apartment. Between the move and being out of town all week, he hasn't had a chance to get settled."

Though I've only given her minimal information, Alice still manages to find something to hone in on. She wiggles her shoulders and excitement puts a sparkle in her eyes. "A quiet night in to get reacquainted. How perfectly romantic."

Before I can point out how ridiculous she is being, the waitress appears and takes our order. I get my usual BLT on whole wheat, and Alice orders a spinach salad. As soon as we get our iced teas, Alice rests her chin on her hands and stares at me with expectation.

"Dear God, woman. What do you want to know?" I ask, knowing she won't quit until I've told her the inner-most musings of my heart and soul.

"Tell me everything! This isn't just some_ guy_; this is Edward freaking Cullen. What's going through your mind right now? And you can pretend not to care all you want, but I know you. I can see you're on the verge of exploding with little pink hearts."

I can't stop the daft smile that slaps across my face. I _am_ excited-and nervous, and too transparent for my own good. With my heart ticking like a bomb, I give in to the mad rush of butterflies and start gushing. "I can't believe he's in my life again, Alice. I mean, we've been apart longer than we've ever been together, but I feel like he never really left. And now he's back, and it's like kismet or something. God, I sound like a moron."

Alice smiles with reverence. "You're happy, honey. Just go with it. In all the years I've known you, and through all the guys I've set you up with, I've never seen you act like this over a man. I think you're right and it is something crazy like kismet. Think about it: Almost twenty years ago, Edward Cullen set a bar for you that no one else has ever come close to clearing. Just look at your dating history: infrequent, meaningless sex with random losers."

My smile falls. "Thanks, Alice. I'm fully aware of how pathetic I am, but hearing it out loud from you time and again really drives it home."

"Sorry, but as far as your sex life is concerned, it's true. Now, before we go any further, Edward is single, right?" she asks in all seriousness. Alice loves the dating scene, and she's good at playing the game, but she is pro-monogamy all the way, whether the relationship lasts three years or three hours.

I shrug. "I haven't heard Edward talk about a girlfriend, or even a bad date, in a long time. In fact, it was about a year ago, right around the time I was dating bipolar-artist guy." Ugh, she's right. My love life is a flaming mess.

"Bipolar-artist guy isn't bipolar, Bella; he's an artist. See what I mean? You never allow yourself to get close to anyone, yet you've talked nonstop about Edward for the past five years. And it turns out _he's_ still single, too? It's a sign. Do you realize how uncommon that is? How many people our age are married with children, or in committed relationships?"

She's right. Nearly all my friends from college are married and starting families. Edward is a catch. He's gorgeous, funny, and brilliant. It's truly amazing some beautiful woman hasn't swooped him up by now.

Alice continues her analysis. "It has to be fate; that's all there is too it. And you know what else I think? I think twenty years ago, you set the bar for him, as well," she says, proud of herself for figuring it all out. "He's your penguin."

I snort. "My what?"

Alice looks at me in earnest, as if what she's about to tell me is straight from the Gospel. "Penguins find their mates early on and spend the rest of their lives living for one another. No other penguin will do, even if they're separated. Edward is your penguin," she said, absolutely sure of herself.

"You need to lay off the National Geographic for a while," I tell her, and she sticks out her tongue. It isn't long before our food is placed in front of us, and I poke at my sandwich with an overcooked fry. "I've never stopped thinking about him-not once. He's the best friend I ever had."

"Hey!" Affronted, Alice throws a cherry tomato, and it glances off my forehead.

"You're the best _girl_friend I ever had. It's different with Edward. I discovered who I was as a person with him-_through _him. Even after he left, he's always been a part of me."

Alice's mouth twists to the side, and her face softens with sentiment. "Maybe you've always been a part of him, too."

I take a large bite of my sandwich to gain a few moments to think about what she said. My mind is still trying to process what Edward told me last night about his years-long plight to land a job at Dean & Crater so he could return to Seattle. Maybe I'm crazy, but I felt like he'd alluded that Iwas one of the reasons he wanted to return. Then again, he also said he gave up on that dream. Edward appeared to be resolute when he told me that part, but he never did explain why he stopped trying.

The duration of our lunch is filled with nonsensical chit chat, and the topic of Edward evaporates. Alice drops me off at the office so I can finish out the day and heads across town for a meeting. Back at my desk, I sneer at the pile of reports in my inbox to organize before I can even think about leaving.

As the hours draw nearer to my so-called date with Edward, it becomes exceedingly difficult to keep my mind on anything else. My fingers are on autopilot, keying in formula after formula and turning the daunting spreadsheets into something my boss will recognize. My mind is so discombobulated, the figures I'm entering don't look right at all. Of course, I'm too busy agonizing over every little detail of the night ahead to pay any real attention.

What will I wear? Should I bring something besides dinner? What will I bring for dinner? It's been thirteen years since Edward and I have hung out, and while his tastes may have changed, our favorite meal as kids was thin crust pizza with bacon, pineapple, and onion. It's still my favorite to this day, and I figure, what the heck? Dinner is settled.

As soon as the clock strikes 4:00, I shut everything down and bolt from my desk. I have to hide my face and scurry past the marketing department when I spot James Hunter leaning against the copy machine. James was hired on last year after a short stint in the military. Sergeant Syphilis, as Alice and I have officially deemed him, has had a boner for me since his first day on the job. Too bad his goal here at Voss Butler is to bed every girl in the office. I manage to sneak by without him noticing and thank God for small favors. He grosses me out, and I'm constantly rebuffing his advances. I don't have time today.

In my haste to get home, I don't wait for Alice as I usually do. There's too much to be done, and I know she'll understand. Traffic can't possibly be any more of a bitch as I creep my way across the bridge, honking and carrying on with the other impatient commuters. Finally, I reach my apartment, and after I feed my over-fed cat, Cubby, I jump in the shower and begin the daunting ritual of getting ready.

After scrubbing every surface of my body, washing my hair, and shaving my legs and underarms, I hop out of the shower and dig my blow dryer out of the bathroom cabinet. Once my hair is dry and smooth, I pop a few hot rollers in to give my ends the body that doesn't exist naturally.

While they set, I stand in the middle of my closet and stare at my clothes in dismay. Ninety percent of my wardrobe consists of work clothes. I have a few nice outfits-Alice's castaways-but I don't want to be overly dressed. We're only unpacking boxes, and who, besides Wilma Flintstone, does housework in heels? Then again, I also don't want to go completely lax and show up in Sunday-morning mode. That's enough to scare anyone away. I settle on a thin, black tunic sweater and a pair of leggings. It's form-fitting enough to flatter my figure and casual enough to still wear my Chucks.

I take the rollers out of my hair and put a touch of makeup on, attempting to enhance my features while still looking natural. Once satisfied, I grab my coat and tell Cubby not to wait up as I head out the door. I sometimes talk to my cat.

It turns out Edward lives only three miles away from my building, and with some time to kill, I stop at Shakespeare's Pizza and place my order. While they're preparing our dinner, I hurry down the sidewalk of the strip mall to the Home Depot and pick up a plant to give Edward as a housewarming gift. It's highly cliché, I know, but he'll appreciate it. I decide on braided bamboo in a stone vase and hope it'll go with his decor.

After picking up the pizza, I make one last stop at the liquor store and purchase a six pack of cheap beer for dinner, and a bottle of Patron for Edward. On my way to Edward's condo, I notice the area around me getting nicer and nicer. I find his place in a cozy little nook of the Market District I'd never noticed before. Juggling the plant, alcohol, and pizza, I get out of my car and make my way to his door, ringing the bell with my elbow.

Only a few seconds pass before Edward opens the door with a big smile. "You made it! Here, let me help you." He's quick to take the bulk of my burden and apologizes for the mess.

He leads me through a maze of boxes, and I set the pizza on the kitchen island and look around at the luxury surrounding me. "Your place is amazing. And so huge."

"Thanks. I've always loved this area," Edward says, and I pretend not to notice him giving me the once over.

"I wasn't sure what to get for dinner, so I just brought our usual. I hope that's okay."

"Bacon, pineapple, and onion?" he asks.

"On thin crust. I also brought you foliage and tequila," I say, gesturing to the bamboo and bottle of Patron. "We need something to toast with, and if I remember correctly, neither of us like champagne very much."

He tsked and shook his head with feigned emotion. "You know me so well, Bella. Thank you. You didn't have to do all this."

"I'm happy to. Now, let's eat before the food gets cold. Then we can start organizing this state of chaos you call a home."

Edward agrees and fishes around in a box marked FRAGILE until he finds two plates and two shot glasses. He hands me the plates, and I put two slices of heaven on each. His table was broken in the move so I take a seat on the countertop to eat while Edward leans against it. As we dine, we talk about the various other times we've shared this same meal with the exception of the beer.

Once we're finished and the Rainer has started to chill me out, Edward asks to make sure I really want to help him unpack. I reply in the positive, ready to get down to business, and he assigns me to the living room. Beautiful, dark mahogany built-in bookcases line the massive room, and a giant flat screen is mounted on the western wall. There are several boxes of books, music, and DVDs that need to be sorted and put in their place.

I take it upon myself to organize his movie collection alphabetically and by genre. After that's done, I arrange his books in equal anal-retentive fashion. Cracking open a new box, I stumble onto an old cassette player and dozens of the mix tapes we created over the years.

"Oh, hell no!" I start plowing through the box.

Edward pipes up from the kitchen. "I'm afraid to know what you've found." I can hear boxes and newspaper rustling around before he joins me.

I hold up the tape player and a handful of cassettes. "I can't believe you still have these."

Edward's face brightens with surprise. "Oh, wow. I can't, either. I didn't know they still existed. When I left for college, my mom put everything I didn't bring with me into storage, and it's been there ever since. I haven't had the chance to go through everything yet. Man, I can't believe she kept these for me."

"Okay, _now_ I feel bad for the Christmas prank."

Edward laughs, and it's music to my ears. He kneels down, studying the various, vaguely marked tapes, and I can't help but take the opportunity to study him. He's wearing dark jeans and a faded Stones T-shirt that clings just right to his arms and shoulders. I have to refrain from touching his muscles as he digs through the pile.

He suddenly stops and his jaw drops. All too quickly, he recovers and looks at me with a soft snort. "Here, this one's for you."

My brows draw in question, and I take the tape from him. "Me?"

"I thought I gave it to you, but I guess I never did." His voice is far off, and the strangest look dawns across his face, as if a switch of realization has been flicked. "I made it before I left. I really thought I'd left it for you. That explains a lot," Edward mutters, more to himself than to me. He shakes his head with a single, sardonic laugh, and just like that, he's back.

"Well, let's put it in." I say and reach for the player.

Edward is quick to block me. "No, no. That's okay. I have no idea what's on that thing, and my ego is just fine the way it is, thank you. Take that thing home with you. Listen to it, burn it, I don't care. I'd rather share the crippling embarrassment and pick one we made together." Grabbing another tape from the box, he reaches over and plugs in the old tape player. Edward reads the faded inscription to himself and gives me a smirk. "Are you ready for this, Swan?"

I'm thrown by the piece of plastic in my fingers but pull myself together. Clearly, the tape embarrasses him, and I don't dwell on it. I toss the clear cartridge on the carpet by my purse and make myself comfortable in front of the box. "Bring it on. I'm dying to know what shame we've recorded."

"Wait for it ..." Edward says, jumping to his feet. He runs to the kitchen, reappearing seconds later with the bottle of Patron and the two shot glasses he unearthed earlier. He sits down across from me and pours us a round. Sliding the cassette into the deck, he presses play and "Don't Fear the Reaper" by Blue Oyster Cult crackles to life.

"Nothing to be ashamed of so far. This is a great song," I acknowledge.

"Got that right." He holds up his small glass. "Here's to old friends and the music that made us outcasts."

"I'll toast to that." I smile and touch my glass to his before downing the shot while the familiar guitar riff sweeps me away. Edward and I have always shared an appreciation for music from the sixties and seventies-our mothers' influence-and this song reminds me of falling leaves and driving to school together on chilly autumn mornings.

He continues pilfering through the tapes, and I find my way to the kitchen to get us two more beers. His voice floats through the hallway. "It's so good to be back here. I finally feel like I'm where I belong."

I close my eyes and smile. Thoughts of becoming more than friends slide through my consciousness before I quickly squash them. _Let's not get carried away, Isabella._

"By the way, are you free tomorrow night?" he asks just as I return to the living room with our cans of Ranier.

My stomach drops as I pop the top off my beer and reclaim my seat on the floor across from him. Holy shit, I think Edward is going to ask me out. I can do this. I can _do_ this. I'm cool, calm, collected, and dying inside. "Hmm, what's that?" I ask, feigning ignorance.

His answer is ambiguous-solemn, even-and once again, I can't read his expression. "Are you free tomorrow? I'd like to take you to dinner. There's something I need to ask you, and something I should have told you a long time ago. In fact, I really regret waiting so long."

I'm dying. I've died. I am dead. My mind goes wild with possibilities, but I collect myself enough to speak. "What are you talking about? Just tell me now."

Edward shakes his head. "I'm not ready to get into it tonight. But if you let me buy you dinner tomorrow, all shall be revealed."

I narrow my eyes at his secrecy but smile just the same. "Edward, that's not necessary. Whatever it is, I'm sure I can handle it." That's a total lie.

His expression is searching as he scans my face. After lingering on my mouth, he finally brings his eyes to mine, and I can feel myself melting into the floor. "I'd like to wait until tomorrow, Bella. I just wanted to make sure you were free. Let's just enjoy tonight for what it is." He holds my questioning gaze for only a few seconds before once again distracting himself with the box between us.

I don't know what to expect from him tomorrow, but the atmosphere has grown heavy, and I need to lighten it before I combust with curiosity. "If it's so important, I guess I can wait. Now, let's turn up the music, drink ourselves silly, and get this condo in order."

"On it," Edward says, cranking up the dial as the current song ends and "Island in the Sun" by Weezer begins. I'm once again transported by the song, but this time, the melody takes me back to the night we said goodbye.

Chapter End Notes:

Hi again! Hmm, what's going on with Edward? Many of you have already begun to speculate, and I love when you tell me about it. Please leave me a review; good, bad, or ugly, I want it all!

A special thanks for two very special ladies, Discordia and Alice's White Rabbit. They polish things up quite nicely, if I do say.

Another huge thanks for my VB, devilsgenie. She's a gem!

**Shameless Plug Alert**

My completed fic, Love, Save the Empty, has been nominated for an award! Top Ten Favorite Fic - Who's Who. I'm totally flattered, and implore you all to check it out. If you don't mind stepping outside the box, then give it a whirl and vote if you love it!

Here's the link:

/top-10-poll-whos-who/

Until next time!


	5. Chapter 5

Author's Chapter Notes:

Hello, hello!

I hope everyone's week is going well. Me? Eh, it's too early to tell. Okay, I know you've been waiting on pins and needles for Edward to finally get on with it, so I won't hold us up any longer.

See me at the bottom for the chapter song and another little surprise ;)

Big thanks to devilsgenie, Alice's White Rabbit, and Discordia for being rockstars.

And off we go!

Chapter Five

"Can we please just call a spade a spade and stop with the pretense?" Alice asks, picking through my jewelry to find something that will complement the sleeveless green dress I'm wearing. "You and Edward are going on a date_._ Why is that so hard for you to admit?"

I finish up in my bathroom and join her in the bedroom. She emits a low whistle, and I strike a pose at her flattery. She's waiting for my answer, and I roll my eyes. "Must you label everything, Alice? What this _is,_ is two friends having dinner and maybe sharing a bottle of wine."

"And a big, fat secret," she mutters, and I sigh; although, she's right. Edward's 'secret' has been on my mind since I left his place last night. Alice merely shrugs at my silence and continues. "I'm just saying ... you don't take a _friend_ to Art of the Table. It's a place for lovers."

"That's a little dramatic, even for you. Didn't we go there for your aunt's birthday last year?" I slide my feet into a pair of black satin pumps, scoffing at her nonsense. "_Lovers_ ... yeah, right." I realize I'm overcompensating in my indifference, but as usual, Alice's words have wormed their way into my already cluster-fucked head. Ideas of what tonight may bring start to turn in my mind like a kaleidoscope, and I stare at myself in the mirror in a foolhardy daze. I need to calm the fuck down. It's bad enough I've been adding fuel to this fire for the last twelve hours by using Edward's mix tape as the soundtrack to my day.

"Oh, I love this song," Alice says, rolling over on the bed to turn up the old stereo I found buried in my utility closet. "Hey Jealousy" by The Gin Blossoms pours from the little black box, and I smile at the innocent memories it holds for me.

Edward spent the ages from eleven to fifteen as the butt of everyone's joke. To make a long, embarrassing story short, let's just say Edward knew his way around the inside of his locker. At the end of each school day, we would meet outside the library. If he didn't show up by 3:15, I knew it meant I had to go let him out.

All of that changed sophomore year. Edward's one trump card in high school was the 1969 Firebird his dad gifted him on his sixteenth birthday. He and Dr. Cullen spent the entire summer rebuilding it from scratch. "Hey Jealousy" procures memories of us cruising along the waterfront in a sweeter ride than anyone else we knew. I never really thought about the lyrics until today.

If Edward hadn't acted so weird about the tape in the first place, I wouldn't have thought twice about any of the songs he recorded for me. But that isn't the case. He _did_ act weird, and I've been listening to every song with a keen ear for any hidden messages. As far as I can calculate, Edward left Seattle twelve years ago feeling exactly the same for me as I still feel for him. And now that I know what Edward's feelings _were_, he wants to take me to dinner tonight and tell me ... what? I don't know, but my imagination is having a field day over it.

"All right, Alice, bling me. What did you pick out?" I ask, holding my arms out. Alice hops off the bed, shoves a gold bangle on each of my wrists, and clasps her hands under her chin. "That's it?" I'm shocked. I'm used to her trying to bedazzle the ever-loving shit out of me.

"That's all you need tonight ... except for this," Alice says. Before I can blink, her fist is in front of my face, and her finger is a blur of motion at the pump of a perfume bottle as she traps me in a mist of fragrance.

I cough and choke and rub my eyes but finally manage to pry the little green bottle out of her iron grip. "I think that's enough! Jesus H!" I yell, tossing the bottle over her shoulder and onto the bed.

"Hey, that's new! Do you know how much that bottle cost?" she asks and dives onto the bed to rescue her latest purchase. "I happen to love this scent. It says_ I'm playful but shy and totally unassuming,_" Alice says, her voice dripping with saccharine. "Don't you agree?" She's now wafting the perfume to her nose with her hands.

"No, Alice. Now that I'm wearing half the bottle, I think it pretty much says _I'm a whore_." I pull a thin black sweater on over my little green dress and grab my beaded clutch. "Now scoot! If I don't leave in the next two minutes, I'll never make it across town by seven." I check once more to make sure I have everything I need as Alice squeals her way off the bed and follows me out the door.

The trek across town isn't nearly as treacherous as I feared, and I pull into the crowded lot of the swanky restaurant with a few moments to spare. Using my time wisely, I touch up my face and brush my thoroughly straightened hair one last time. A light rain has started, and I curse myself for never having an umbrella handy. Utilizing my clutch as a makeshift shelter, I run to the door as fast as I can without tripping over my heels and making a meal of the sidewalk.

Upon entering, I shake my purse and brush the water off my cashmere sweater. In line to give my name to the hostess, I take a couple deep breaths and give myself a brief pep talk. _Just stay calm; think before you speak; don't be a spaz._ There, that should do it.

I give my name to the perky blonde, and a maîtred_'_ appears and shows me the way to Edward's table. As soon as I see him, my heart takes off. He's wearing a perfectly tailored charcoal suit with a bright blue tie. His hair is artfully disheveled, there's light stubble covering his jaw, and he is perfect.

Edward stands, and the warmest smile brightens his face as his eyes sweep over me. Leaning in, he kisses my cheek. His scent is so alluring, I nearly groan aloud. I can only pray he's not choking in my cloud of Dior.

Fucking Alice.

"You're stunning, Bella. I can't get over seeing you all grown up," he says before releasing me and pulling out my chair. Our eyes don't break contact as he helps me get seated.

"It's just me, Edward," I quietly remind him.

The oddest chuckle escapes before he heads to his own seat. "_Just_," he mutters under his breath, and I pretend not to hear him.

"I guess the last time I saw you in a suit was on graduation night. You look hot." Oh, God, not again. What the hell is wrong with me, and where is my filter? I laugh it off and flail to recover from my inane observation. "Of course, I much prefer the threadbare hoodies and sock hats of old, but you know, this look is okay, too."

Edward smirks, and the soft lighting makes his eyes glitter. "Careful what you say. I found a few hats in one of those old storage boxes, and I'm not above to putting them back in rotation."

"A style revival. I love it," I say with a laugh. Interrupting our moment, a foppish waiter appears and takes my drink order. Edward and I don't say much in his absence, and he soon returns with my house white wine. After a few long moments, I decide Edward has had enough time to prepare himself for whatever it is he needs to say. I nudge his leg under the table with my foot. "So what do you have to tell me?"

Edward takes a deep breath and his cheeks puff when he releases it. "So much that I don't know where to start." His eyebrows draw together in earnest, and he glances at his watch. "I always thought I'd have more time, but time slipped away, and now here I am." Edward suddenly can't sit still, and his manic hands fidget with every object they can reach.

"Edward, you're kind of freaking me out."

He doesn't respond. Instead, his actions display his nervous tendency to be overtly fastidious as he straightens his napkin and adjusts the angle of the bourbon glass on top of it. With another deep breath, Edward realizes what he's doing and takes a drink.

My eyes are glued to the drop of condensation that remains on his bottom lip when he takes the glass away. In my state of hypnosis, I mutter, "Start at the very beginning."

One minute goes by and then another as Edward tries to figure out where 'the beginning' is for him. I remain silent, fascinated by the variety of emotions that play across his face. The suspense is killing me, and I realize I haven't exhaled the entire duration of our silence. The air whooshes out of me in a hot gust. "You know you can tell me anything."

He finally meets my eyes, and his worry softens. "You're right, I know. Bella, you don't know how long I've waited to come back here-how long I've waited to see you again. I just ... I just know we're going to be so happy here."

I smile and quirk my head at his odd play on words. He's already referring to us as _we_? This is turning out to be much easier than I thought.

I know he senses my confusion, but his eyes flick past my shoulder and widen ever so slightly. Something behind me has captured Edward's attention, and he begins to fidget again. His voice is slightly higher when he speaks again, tinged with urgency. "Bella, the thing is ... I only stopped trying to get a job here last year ... when I met Anna."

I'm so thoroughly confused by his energy that what he's actually saying doesn't compute. "I don't understand."

Mercurial as ever, Edward's worry transforms once again, this time into reassurance. He graces me with a genuine smile. "You will," he tells me and stands up.

Before I can voice my confusion yet again, we're joined at the table by a striking brunette in a red satin dress. I watch, stunned, as Edward whisks her into his arms, and his words finally sink in. "_When I met Anna." _I stare at them with my mouth hanging open like a dead mackerel. Time stands still, and all I can hear is the rush of blood in my ears.

Edward stares at his centerfold with a reverential smile. "Bella, I'd like you to meet Anna Van Cleve ... my fiancée." Anna returns his ardor with a bat of her eyelashes and picks a spot of lint off his jacket before turning to me with a smile.

Did he just say_ fiancée? _I cannot move or speak. I was shocked before, but now, I feel as if I've been shot with a stun gun. My slack-jawed stupor makes for a very unpleasant atmosphere, and Anna stifles an uncomfortable laugh. My inner diva is nowhere to be found, and without her, my awkwardness drowns us all.

Anna raises her eyebrows at Edward, and he clears his throat. "Um, Anna, this is my good friend, Bella Swan."

Anna's smile cranks up to full wattage once again. "Bella, it's nice to finally meet you."

What does she mean _finally?_ She _knows _about me? What kind of alternate universe have I stepped into here? I manage to find my voice. "Forgive me, Anna. You look just like someone I used to know," I lie, grasping for straws. I need an excuse for my lumbering idiocy, and false recognition is the best my mind can come up with at the moment. "Did you go to U-Dub?" I ask weakly, throwing in my alma mater for good measure.

Anna presses her perfect, glossy lips into a regretful smile, and Edward answers for her. "No, Anna's from New York. And she studied art abroad at Oxford."

I laugh off the supposed mix-up as best I can and stand up to shake her hand. "I'm so terrible with faces. It's great to meet you, Anna." I've got my best game face on, but inside, I'm dying. Edward looks at me, and with his trained eye, I know he sees my struggle. He's always been incredibly attuned to my emotions, and over the years, I've found it to be both a blessing and a curse.

We all take our seats, and I get a few seconds to process what's happening while Edward asks his soon-to-be wife about the flight she just came from. _How did this happen?_ How can Anna know who I am when Edward's told me nothing of her? She's been in his life long enough for him to fall in love and ask for her hand in marriage, yet he never once mentioned it to me.

A sudden realization jars me. There's a huge part of Edward's life, of his heart, that he didn't want me to be a part of. We've always kept up a regular stream of emails, but up until the point he told me he was moving back to town, we'd only spoken on the phone a couple other times this year. The last time Edward called me merely to shoot the shit was back in February after Emmett's wife popped out baby number three.

"So, Bella ... Edward tells me you work for Voss Butler. Tell me about what you do," Anna says, effectively bringing me out of my haze.

For the first time in my life, I'm thankful for the part of my brain that's always on work. I ramble off the details of my job without having to think too hard about it. Unfortunately, before I realize it, I'm also rambling on about the quarterly audit we're in the midst of. Once Anna realizes I'm nothing more than a drone who performs grunt work for greater men, she loses interest. My subconscious is screaming at me to shut the hell up, but I just can't. When I finally _do_ manage to find a stopping point, I shove a piece of bread into my mouth to ensure my silence.

Edward and Anna share an amused look. "Wow, sounds stressful," she comments, winking at her fiancé.

"It's all right," I mutter with half a roll stuffed in my cheek. My ears are so hot they feel as if they've combusted. Alice would be so disappointed in me right now. In order to save myself, I know I have to keep the conversation flowing and ask Anna something about herself in return. But what the hell do I say? I know nothing about her. Does _she_ know that I know nothing about her? "Anna, you'll have to remind me what it is that you do," I say, sliding my eyes from the brown-eyed goddess across from me to Edward. He's no help whatsoever and keeps his eyes glued to the table. I could strangle him right now.

"I'm an artist-a painter, actually. I've spent most of the last month in Spain, studying under Jesús Mari Lazkano," she informs me. I smile and nod with zeal in return, pretending to be impressed, although I haven't the slightest clue who she's referring to. "In fact, I'm only in Seattle long enough to get settled in our new home before leaving again for Paris. I'm trying to get this one here to go with me, but no such luck." She smiles at me, cocking her head in Edward's general direction.

A peel of awkward, high-pitched laughter escapes my throat. Of course she's beautiful, rich, _and_ talented. That would only make sense. "Why aren't you going, Edward?" I ask and stuff another chunk of bread into my mouth to quell my growing urge to vomit.

Edward is uneasy, and a brief veil of panic that only I seem to notice steals his features. "Well, I don't think my new bosses would appreciate it if I took a vacation so soon after starting. I'm lucky they were kind enough to give me time off for the honeymoon." He looks at Anna with a tight smile. "Besides, if you want to remodel, someone needs to be here to oversee things."

Anna rolls her eyes and leans across the table, speaking to me as if Edward isn't sitting right next to her. "Ugh, his job, the condo, blah, blah, blah. It's none of those things, Bella. It's this damn city and everything in it. He's been absolutely _obsessed_ with moving back here since I've known him." She pauses and looks me up and down with calculation. "He may have proposed to _me_-" Anna pauses, giving me a chance to absorb her message. "-but I feel like the man already has a wife ... and her name is Seattle." She gives me a chilly smile with one, perfectly stenciled eyebrow cocked high on her head.

I think I just swallowed my tongue. Apparently, we're past the pleasantries, and I know exactly what she's doing. Jesus, why doesn't she just hike her leg and pee on him-save us all a little time?

Edward adjusts his tie and emits a dry chuckle at her poorly disguised stake of claim. "It's a great place to live, sweetie-a great place to start a family," he states, taking her hand in his. The three of us are in a dangerous, tri-party tango of innuendo, and his subtle reassurance puffs Anna up at the same time as it deflates me completely.

All the expectation I held for tonight; all the horrifyingly inaccurate assumptions I'd conjured up about where things could go between Edward and I. . . . The Powers That Be have thrown a custard pie right in my face, and it serves me for letting my stupid fantasies consume me. Everything I thought I felt since the moment Edward arrived has been wrong. Any sort of heightened connection I imagined between us was all a farce. None of those things actually existed outside of my own head. Edward has a beautiful, wealthy, educated, protective fiancée to love him, and I'll never be anything more than his childhood buddy.

This is going to be a long night, and I take a big drink of wine to dull the migraine that's already setting up base camp in my frontal lobe. This whole situation is an utter disaster, but as much as I want to run away and cry myself into next week, I can't. I've been living in a dream world for far too long; I need to face the facts, not hide from them. What I really need to do right now is bend over and let the truth have its ugly way with me once and for all. With that in mind, I grab hold of the knife that's already in my heart and give it a big twist.

"So, you two ... when's the big day?" Guh, that's painful.

Edward and Anna share another look, and Anna answers this time, dangling her hand in front of my face to make sure I get a good look at the iceberg Edward has put on it. I gasp my astonishment and take another large drink to drown the scream that's building inside me. "July twenty-seventh. Of course, being Edward's oldest and dearest friend, you _have_ to be a part of it."

My breath hitches mid-swallow, and I start to choke, holding a napkin to my mouth to muffle my coughing. Muttering an apology, I struggle to get white wine out of my trachea. Christ, I can hardly imagine attending their wedding as a _guest_ and sitting at the awkward singles table, let alone contributing to the debauchery. Edward offers me his napkin, but I shake my head and finally pull myself together. "I'm so sorry-wrong tube. I'm good now." Fuck my life; why can't I just disappear? "Wow, the twenty-seventh? That's hardly over a month away!"

Anna smiles with triumph and nods at Edward. He looks into my eyes, and after a moment, we both soften in the comfort of each other's gaze. A look of resolution settles his discomfort, and he smiles. "Bella, you've been my best friend for the better part of a generation. We've been through everything together. Through hell and high water, we survived adolescence together. I feel like you know me better than most," he says, and his eyes never leave mine, even when Anna stifles an uncomfortable giggle. "A long time ago, life put us on different paths. But fate has thrown us together again, and I have to believe it's for a reason." Sincerity is rolling off of him in waves, and I feel my chest warm from the inside out. "The thing is ... Anna is going to be gone for a couple weeks throughout the next month. Like she said earlier, she'll be going to Paris for work. But after that, she has to be in New York for her family. Her grandmother is ill, and since she won't be able to make it to the wedding, Anna will be-"

"Edward, you're rambling; just get on with it," Anna snaps, following it up with a sugary laugh to soften the blow.

The warmth in my chest has grown into a blazing inferno of embarrassment, and it creeps up my neck as I stare into my drink. Edward merely side-glances her as he continues, but a new edge of desperation underlines his words. "Bella, I can't do this without help-without _your_ help. I'll be meeting with florists and DJ's and tasting cake. There's so much to do; I don't even know where to begin. I would ask my mom to help, but she and Dad can't make it until three days before the wedding, and-"

Anna slaps her hand on the table, rattling the silverware and startling us both. "Will you help us plan our wedding, Bella?" she hisses through a large, fake grin. Once the glaring impatience is out of her system, Anna glances around to see we aren't the only ones staring at her. She draws her shoulders up and straightens her posture with a demure smile. "Edward and I would really appreciate it if you would assist us with some of the final details. Even with crystal clear instructions-" she throws an annoyed glance at Edward "-he doesn't have a clue what to do by himself. I know we shouldn't be asking this of you, but Edward refuses to hire an assistant. I don't know if I'll ever see my grandmother again; otherwise, I would never dream of leaving so close to the date."

Once again, I'm stunned. I can only stare back at them in response as they sit before me; Adonis and his agitated Aphrodite, side-by-side. Staring at Anna, I watch as one corner of her mouth draws up and her eyes narrow slightly. Holy shit, she's enjoying my discomfort.

"I-I don't know what to say." And I really don't. What am I _supposed _to say? I shake my head, tearing my eyes away from Anna's disturbing glee. "I don't ... know."

Edward gives me a golden smile and grabs my hand with both of his, pulling me into his atmosphere of comfort. "Please, Bella? I promise it won't be too much, but I _need_ you," he says, and before his desperation becomes any more evident to the Ice Queen beside him, he shrugs. "Besides, how can I get married without my best friend there to help me every step of the way?" He offers a light laugh to soften the mood, but his piercing green eyes plead for my understanding ... for my blessing.

"Well ..." I close my eyes, swallowing the giant boulder in my throat, and nod. "Of course ... I'd be happy to help you guys out."

Goddamn_._

Chapter End Notes:

*peaks out from behind desk*

Hey, guys ... So, now we know. Some of you hit the nail on the head, some had no idea, but I think all of you knew it wouldn't be pretty. Every story has to have conflict and drama, right? Yes, they do. Even one's marked under the humor/romance catagory. I promise there will be a HEA, so don't nail me to the cross yet!

The song for this chapter is SUPER fun and much more current than the others. I BEG you to please listen to it. It's called "Put the Gun Down" by ZZ Ward, and it perfectly encompasses Bella's dramatics. Please, please listen!

Here's the song link:

watch?v=TH_73vzKSKg

And now for a little extra something, here's a banner I made for Anna. It's something for you to project your hate onto, LOL. Take a look and let me know if she embodies your imaginings. Here's the link:

.

Take care, guys! Don't forget to leave me a review-good, bad, or ugly-and I'll see you next week!


	6. Chapter 6

Author's Chapter Notes:

Hey gang!

I want to thank everyone who reviewed after the last chapter. It's been a rough week for both me and Edward. I knew Anna was going to be a surprise, although some of you guessed what would happen, but I never anticipated the reaction I got. Reviews started pouring in while I was at work and, not having the opportunity to really look at them, I was super bummed about all the negativity.

Then, I got home and read each of them individually. What I mistook as negativity, was actually well-thought out, passionate, and very constructive criticism. I was touched by the response it evoked in all of you.

Maybe I'm dense, but I hadn't planned for anyone to take this as anything more than a cheesy rom-com (as I told several of you in my replies). Knowing how many of you felt the brunt of the blow just as hard, if not harder, than Bella was incredibly humbling. It made me take a step back and realize that I need to start being more mindful of my writing.

I need you to know that I'm not writing this story for the sake of getting a rise, and I don't enjoy fucking with peoples emotions. Several readers have dropped this story, and that really sucks, but it's a personal choice that I respect. Others told me they actually cried over it, and it made me feel like a big mean bully. Again, it was not my intention. This story is not about putting shock out there for shock's sake.

I was really excited about chapter 5, but after what happened, I waivered about whether or not to continue. If no one likes Edward and everyone hates me for making him human, where's the fun in that for anyone? Alas, I will not give up on this journey. I have a plan. I made a decision six weeks ago to start posting this story and, very much like Bella, I rarely turn back on a decision after it's been made.

For those of you who chose to continue with this story, I hope to make you glad you did. I love, respect, and appreciate every single review I've received so far. As I always say: good, bad, or ugly, I want it all, and I'll say it again and again. Thank you for making me realize the power I have as a writer, and I promise to never abuse it.

Okay! I'm sure you're all ready to know what happened after the initial shock wore off for our poor Bella. Let's go back to that night and find out.

The song for this chapter is a good one. It's called "Everything's Ruined" by Fountains of Wayne. Here's the link: watch?v=bDo7dE3wt5k

**I'd like to give a special shout out to A Different Forest for recommending The Space Between. I've gained so many new readers in the past week because of it, and I thank you, whoever you are, for thinking highly enough of this story to put the word out!**

I do not own Twilight.

Onward, we go.

Chapter Six

I park my aging Ford outside Alice's house and hurry through the pouring rain, no longer worried about what it's doing to my appearance. Knocking on her door, I wipe a hand over my face, clearing away the mixture of tears and rainwater. I drove all the way here in a fit of sobs, and between my emotions and the rain, it's a wonder I made it alive. _Come on, come on, come on, _I plead silently. I'm soaked, my teeth are chattering, I have no idea what happened to my sweater, and there's a massive, gaping wound where my heart used to be.

Alice opens the door just wide enough for the chain to catch and quickly shuts it again. I can hear her cry of surprise on the other side as she slides the lock open. The door flies open, and Alice pulls me into her house and into her arms. "My God, Bella! What happened to you? What's wrong?"

I pull away from her, and my hands shake as I run them through my dripping wet hair. Fresh tears spill down my cheeks as I blubber a response. "Everything! Everything is wrong. I swear to God, there is something fundamentally wrong with me. I show up to the restaurant, expecting-I don't know _what_ I was expecting-and then she just comes out of nowhere, and I-"

Alice grabs my shoulders and gives me a hard shake. "Bella, stop! You're freaking out. Calm down and tell me what happened."

I take deep breaths and nod my head. Alice is not above smacking the crap out of me if I don't get ahold of myself. Just as I'm about to fill her in on every detail of my misery, a throat clears behind me, and I realize I've interrupted Alice's reunion with Big Shiny. "Oh, shit, Alice. I totally forgot," I tell her with a loud sniffle. Glancing over my shoulder, my eyes widen in surprise. What the hell did I just walk in on? It's not Big Shiny behind me ... it's Edward's friend Jasper.

I look at Alice, but she ignores the giant question mark above my head and opens the foyer closet. Pulling out a long, black trench coat, she shoves it at Jasper's chest. "I'm sorry, Jaz, but you have to go. I'll give you a call tomorrow or something." The man doesn't even have the chance to speak before she shoves him out the door and closes it behind him. I open my mouth and point at the door, but Alice cuts me off at the pass. "Never mind that. Now, tell me what the hell is going on."

I rub my fingers under my eyes and they come away stained with mascara. At once, I deflate and my heart shrivels at the tragedy of the evening, thus far.

"Come on," Alice says softly and takes my hand, leading me into her living room. She takes a seat on the couch, but I can't sit still and walk a slow pace from the window to the wall.

"It's over, Alice," I inform her, shaking my head as I look into her big blue eyes.

"What do you mean? What did Edward say?" she asks. I can't speak, and another wave of tears crumples my face. Alice balls her hands into tiny fists of fury. "I _knew_ it. I knew he was too good to be true. You should never trust someone that good looking. Tell me what he did to you, Bella, because I _will_ kill a motherfucker." Alice has always been protective of me.

I sigh, taking a seat across the room on the edge of her suede chaise lounge. "He didn't _do_ anything to me." I tilt my head back to try to keep the tears from falling, but it's no use, and they fall anyway. I drop my head into my hands and moan my response like a wounded animal. "Edward is getting _married_. He brought me to dinner tonight to meet his fiancée."

Alice's mouth is frozen in a silent 'o'of confused horror as she processes the information I've just laid before her. "He's engaged? But ... but he's your penguin," she murmurs.

"He's not my goddamn penguin, Alice. He's someone else's."

In a flash, Alice is off the couch and pacing an angry ditch into the carpet. "Edward's engaged, and he never told you about it before tonight? What kind of shit is that? Who _does_ that?"

"Alice," I say, massaging my aching head, but she doesn't hear me.

"You guys kept in contact all these years. You're supposed to be best friends. And what about the mix tape he gave you? That son-of-a-bitch has been sending you mixed signals since he got here!"

"Alice, please!" I yell as my tears turn to anger-not at her, but at myself.

She turns to me and throws her hands in the air. "What? Aren't you thinking about _any_ of this right now? Because you should be."

"Of course I am. All of it-it's all I can think about."

"Then, what?"

"He's not the asshole here, okay? It's me! I'm the _moron_ who read way too much into things. Yeah, I'm confused as hell. He's been with Anna for over a year now and never told me. I have no idea why he didn't say anything before tonight, and believe me, I _will_ talk to him about it, but we've been living separate lives for over a decade. Can I really be mad at the guy for falling in love because it puts a kink in my psychotic delusions?"

Alice has stopped pacing and is now picking the paint off the mantle above her fireplace. She sees my point, although neither of us likes it, and gives a bitter huff. "_Anna_," she mutters with a sneer.

I groan and scoot myself back until my head is resting against the plush black leather. Blindly, I reach behind me and yank the cashmere blanket off the back of the chair, pulling it over my head. She hasn't even heard the worst part yet, and I know I'm in for it. As much as I don't want to, it's better to rip that Band-Aid off in one fell swoop.

"There's more," I say through the soft material, and Alice is intrigued at once. She crosses the room and is perched on the end of the chaise before I can pull the blanket off my head. Her listening ears are on, and her eyes glisten with curiosity. I've always had a weak spine-something Alice has been trying to correct for years-and it's hard to look her in the eye as I spill my shame. "The wedding is a little over a month away and Anna has to be out of town for a couple weeks for various reasons. I ... sort of agreed to help Edward finish planning the wedding." Alice rubs her temples as she mutters something under her breath, and I try to soften the blow for both of us. "It's just a few final details, and only on the days she won't be in town."

"Oh, Bella," Alice says, sighing and tsking her disappointment. It reminds me of my mother. "This is so _typically_ you: too nice to say no, even if it's going to kill you." She shakes her head with a shrug. "What are you doing to yourself, here?"

"I don't know. I don't know why I said yes. Jesus, after the initial shock, I wanted to be angry, too, but ... I just can't be. I'm disappointed and embarrassed at myself, but as much as I try, I can't justify being mad at Edward. People go off to college, grow up, and get married every single day. Aside from springing it on me the way he did, he's done nothing wrong." I close my eyes and think of the way he'd plead for my help, completely unaware of my crazy infatuation with him. "He merely asked an old friend for help; there's nothing wrong with that. Maybe I shouldn't have agreed to it, but you weren't there, Alice. He just looked so _lost_ at the prospect of doing everything alone. Fuck, I don't know. So, I'm a masochist-what else is new, right?"

Alice finally thaws and mends the small distance between us, wrapping her twig-like arms around me. "I'm so sorry, B," she says, and I mutter my love for her against her shoulder. Alice pulls away with one more long-winded sigh. "I just know how excited you were, and it physically hurts me to see you this upset. I could kill Edward Cullen right now. I swear, if I've said it once, I've said it a million times. You're too nice for your own good."

I think about the long month ahead of me, and my entire frame sags. "What am I going to do?"

Alice opens her mouth but nothing comes out. This is not good. Usually, when I pose that particular question, she whips out her never-ending laundry list of things I need to do, or should be doing differently. Her silence only tells me what I already know: I am fucked.

Drawing my legs up, I rest my chin on my knees and peruse my options. There aren't many. Really, there's nothing _to_ do but keep my word. "I guess I already know what I'm going to do. I'm going to help Edward plan his wedding. It might kill me, but I already gave my answer."

Alice shakes her head again with a single, dry laugh. "It's The Imp of the Perverse," she muses aloud. "This is so tragically unnecessary. Even _I _can't talk you through this one. I've never handled a situation like this; where do I even begin?" She chews her thumbnail for the briefest of moments before bouncing off the chair. "Tea. I'll make us some tea."

I follow her into the kitchen, taking the blanket with me. I'm not quite dry yet, and my all-around dampness has chilled me to the bone. Taking a seat at her granite breakfast counter, I watch as Alice fills the kettle and turns on the stove. Once that's done, she opens the top door of the large, paneled refrigerator and pulls out a brand new half-gallon of Baskin-Robbins Pistachio Almond, our designated go-to for all of life's problems. She peels off the lid, hands me a spoon, and hops onto the stool next to mine.

We're both nursing a heaping spoonful of ice cream when Alice breaks the silence. "So, what's she like-this Anna? Honestly, what kind of woman leaves town for weeks on end the month before her own wedding?"

"It's weird, I know. But her grandma is sick or something, and she wants to pay her a visit."

Alice hums, not satisfied with my answer. "Is she at least nice? I mean, I guess she'd have to be to leave her man alone with a woman she barely knows to plan _her _wedding."

An uncertain chuckle escapes me at the memory of Anna's attitude, and Alice raises her eyebrows with interest. I shrug. "I don't know if I'd use the word nice to describe her. She's pretty intimidating, actually."

"Is she pretty?" Alice asks, and I take a few seconds to think about Anna in all her physical splendor. How does one put perfection into words?

"She's stunning. It isn't hard to see why Edward is taken with her. She's very cultured, very well-traveled. She's a painter and travels all over Europe for inspiration; she even studied at Oxford. Her family is insanely wealthy. In fact, she puts the Van Cleve in VC Petroleum. She's rich, talented, and beautiful beyond belief. She's everything a guy could hope for, and so much more than I'll ever be."

"Do _not_ say things like that, Bella," Alice chastises around a mouthful of frozen dessert. "None of those things mean dick if she's not a nice person." From across the kitchen, the kettle blows its whistle, and she goes to work making us each a cup of Jasmine tea. Alice sets a steaming mug in front of me and reclaims her seat. "Don't worry. I'm sure there's a bright side here; you just have to look for it. Edward's stock just plummeted in my book, but if you're hell-bent on being a part of this, then I guess the only good thing is that he's in your life again. You have your old buddy back." She mulls on her own words and shoves another bite of ice cream into her mouth. "Pretty shitty silver-lining, if you ask me."

"Yeah," I agree with half a heart. I've stopped eating and lose myself in drawing designs with my spoon on the soft, green surface. I do hope Edward is happy, but the instinct that he isn't pokes at my consciousness. My expression must mirror my thoughts, and Alice notices.

"What's that face, Isabella Marie?"

"Nothing, I just ... I don't think Anna's exactly happy about the idea of me. I don't think she feels threatened or anything, but I'm pretty sure she could see right through me," I tell her, thinking of her few but pointed outbursts, her overt stakes of claim, and the looks she'd tossed my way all throughout dinner.

Alice lays her teabag on the counter and takes a thoughtful sip. "If that's the case, then why would she ask you to be a part of her wedding? It's all so fucked up; I guess I just don't understand."

"Honestly, I don't either, but I got the hairiest vibe from her all night long. I felt like everything she said to me was a direct challenge. It even made Edward uncomfortable, though he never really acknowledged it."

"This whole thing is insane-Edward not telling you about his engagement, _you_ volunteering your services even though you don't know the first thing about weddings. Why don't they just hire a planner; obviously, they can afford it?" Alice asks.

"I guess it's going to be a pretty small wedding, and she said Edward didn't want to go that route."

"You're right, you know. You really are a masochist. You exploit your own emotions and derive a sick pleasure from doing it. You're a total bitch but only to yourself. If Edward could see the way you look right now, if he really knew what this is doing to you, I bet he'd call the whole wedding-planner thing off."

Maybe she's right. I've been living too long on the overly-romanticized memory of a single kiss that happened over a decade ago. I've fed it, nurtured it for so many years, bending and shaping it until it meant something to me that it was never supposed to mean. I've been missing Edward for so long that I'll do anything to keep him close now that he's back; even if that means helping him prepare to pledge his life to someone else.

Regardless, there's a part of my brain that can't ignore what I _know _I felt. There's a reason Edward chose not to tell me about Anna, and the sickest part of my mind won't rest until I know what it is. Fuck, I'm tired.

There's so much to think about, so much I need to analyze tonight when I'm alone. But for now, I just need to stop talking about it. "Speaking of disturbingpleasures, don't think you're off the hook. Just what the hell was going on when I got here? Where's Big Shiny?" I ask, officially closing the subject of Edward.

Alice's jaw drops and indignity scrunches her face. I smile at her display and shove more ice cream into my mouth. She rolls her eyes and puts her mug down. "His _name_ is Logan, and we broke up. He found out he has to be in Brussels for the next three months, and we just aren't close enough to try anything long distance. Don't give me shit, Bella. I'm heartbroken over it."

I can't hold back my snort. "Yes, clearly. And I guess Jasper just came by to shoot the breeze? Hmm, Alice? Did you have a jar that needed opening? Perhaps, a light bulb that needed _screwing_?"

"All right, I like him. Shit," she snaps, and I laugh. Alice is such a sore loser, and it can be pretty fun to watch.

"Didn't we just spend the last two days laughing over his utter buffoonery? What the hell did I miss?" I go in for another scoop of ice cream, but she snatches the carton away and slaps the lid on, sending me over the edge again.

"You've had enough."

"Oh, I'm just giving you shit," I tell her through the last of my laughter. "Tell me about him. I'm dying to know what he did to redeemed himself."

Alice eyes me skeptically, and I do my best to wipe the smile from my face. When she decides I'm no longer laughing at her, a girlish smile tugs at the corners of her mouth. "He's really ... sweet. At first he was a total skeeve-well, you saw-but once I told him to either lose the act or get lost, he started being himself, and ... I didn't hate it."

I pull my legs up to sit Indian-style on the stool and wrap the blanket around me like a cocoon. "When did all this happen? You haven't even mentioned it."

"When we were at Dimetriou's, sitting at the bar. I didn't say anything because you were so excited about ... you know. I'm always boring you with the details of my love life, and I didn't want to rain on your parade."

"That's sweet, Alice. But my parade has been put on permanent rain delay, so tell me everything."

"Well, when we first sat down at the bar, he was really laying it on thick. I couldn't take it anymore and called him out on it. I asked him why he thought he needed to be like that to get attention. I guess it took him by surprise, and once he realized I wasn't impressed, he let his guard down."

"Wow, Alice the snake charmer."

Alice smiled, staring into her mug. "At heart, he's just a good guy who's been burned. He didn't really go into things, but it's easy to see he's got some scars. All that Mr. Hot Shot mumbo jumbo is just his way of overcompensating for his vulnerability. And he's really quite handsome, once you see past the jerky façade-lightly tanned skin, baby blue eyes, a great body ..." She finally looks up, and huffs at my large, knowing grin. "What?"

"You're smitten."

"Shut up."

"You are a smitten kitten," I tease.

"Quit it!"

"Me-_ow_."

"You're hilarious. Yes, I like him; now stop being a whore," she says, trying to contain her smile.

"Impossible. That's like asking the Pope to stop being a Catholic," I say, and we both get caught up in a fit of snorts and giggles.

After a moment of silence, I lean over and nudge her with my shoulder. "I love you. Thank you for making me feel better. I didn't think it was possible after tonight."

She sighs. "I love you more, but I'm still against this. I'm sorry, but nothing good can come of this. Are you sure you're going to be okay?"

I take a deep breath and look at her with a weak smile. "I will be," I tell her, and I really want to believe it's true. I have no idea what the next several weeks will bring, and I'm not looking forward to the conversation Edward and I need to have before this thing goes any further. I'll need a moment to decompress before I can even think about that part, but with a new perspective on my old friend, I'm sure I'll be able to handle whatever comes my way.

Alice takes the lid back off the ice cream and slides the carton in front of me. We both dig in, and I hold my spoon up in a toast to my self-flagellation. "Bring on the hideous taffeta gowns, Baby's Breath, and cheap champagne; it's time to plan a wedding."

"I'm not toasting that," Alice replies, shoving the spoon into her mouth.

"I didn't think you would," I say, doing the same.

Chapter End Notes:

Okay, so Bella's a self-acknowledged masochist. The Imp of the Perverse is an interesting concept which a lot of us can relate to. It's also a short story written by Edgar Allan Poe that I highly recommend.

I really want to thank my betas, Alice's White Rabbit and devilsgenie. They are both so encouraging and have an such incredible faith in me. I love them dearly. Discordia is an excellent pre-reader, and I thank her for her services.

Now that you've read the chapter and listened to the song (I hope), please leave me a review and tell me what you're thinking. Good, bad, or hideous.

Thanks guys! I'll see you all next week.

XOXO,

A


	7. Chapter 7

Author's Chapter Notes:

Hello there!

I'd first like to say THANK YOU for showing this story such amazing support. I'm floored by the reviews I've gotten so far. You guys are amazing, and I've even picked up a couple fandom-friends. Cheers, guys!

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Okay, the song for this chapter is "The Sound of Settling" by Death Cab for Cutie. Here's the link:

watch?v=t0jd4JT7h7o

Here we go!

Chapter Seven

"_Good morning and good news for all you Seattle-ites; summer has finally arrived! That's right, it's time to break out those bikini tops and booty shorts, we'll be in the eighties by lunchtime ..."_

I throw a pillow at my alarm clock, hoping to shut it the hell up, and the margin of which I miss is shameful. It's Saturday morning, and although I need get up, I just don't wanna. I fell asleep with my window open for the first time all year, and a warm, balmy breeze wafts through my room. It brings with it the familiar sounds and smells of my neighborhood. Children are playing at the park across the street, and fresh bread from the bakery next door tempts my nose. All right, damn it. I'm up.

I drag myself out of bed and putter to the bathroom in slow motion, wondering if my lack of energy has more to do with Edward than the sixty-hour work week I'm just coming off of. I haven't seen him since the night I met Anna, and that was over a week ago. Apparently, the week was hellish for both of us, and aside from a quick text session on Thursday to firm up our plans for today, we haven't spoken at all.

Today is my first official day as Edward and Anna's wedding planner/assistant bitch. Edward is scheduled to be downtown at 10:30 for a tuxedo fitting, and then we're heading across the sound to pick up some custom-made favors Anna ordered from a print shop on Bainbridge Island. I admit, I have no idea about any of this stuff, but I promised to give it my best, and that's what I'll do.

After the disaster at the restaurant, I scurried away like a church mouse to wallow in my misery. I'm still in shock, and I'm still nervous about seeing Edward again. My resounding period of decompression lasted longer than I thought it would, but as it usually does, time has softened the blow. If I was any kind of a woman, I would've confronted him by now; I would've asked him why he'd kept his and Anna's relationship a secret all this time. Unfortunately, my vagina is MIA. If Edward thinks it's no big deal, then maybe he's right. Maybe we've grown apart a lot more than I ever dared to acknowledge, and I need to just get over it.

I don't know what to expect. Will Edward explain himself once we're face-to-face? More importantly, if he doesn't explain things, will I be able to bring it up without sounding like a brokenhearted loser? God, I hope so.

After a quick shower, I dig some summer clothes out of the back of my closet and slip into my favorite pair of jean shorts. I yank the tag off a top I bought at the end of last summer but never got a chance to wear and pull myself together with one eye on the clock. Edward should be here any minute to pick me up.

I kill time by powering through a yogurt and a glass of O.J. My laptop beckons to me from the kitchen counter, and I decide to check my email. Waiting for it to power up, I feed Cubby and go through the mail that's been stacking up on the counter.

Against my better judgment, I check my work email and curse out loud when I see an email from Prazan. He's gotten into the very bad habit of sending me work on the weekends 'just in case' I have any 'downtime'. For a split-second, I consider deleting it but hold back. Alice is going to a concert with Jasper tonight, which leaves me to keep myself entertained. Looks like another Saturday night of Jeopardy, white wine, and work. I am way too young to have this much downtime. Who the fuck TiVo's Jeopardy?

Before the glaring shame of my social life can put any more of a damper on my mood, I hear a familiar knock at the door. Closing the laptop, I take a deep breath and cross the room. I know it's Edward because he's using our signature knock-three quick wraps, two short. I respond in kind before opening the door. Edward's leaning against the frame in a T-shirt, faded jeans, and a knit cap. Like a memory from a dream, he's a perfect image of the boy I used to know.

My eyebrows pull together, and I point to his headgear. "What's going on up there? Please don't tell me that's the same green hat you glued to your head for all of eighth grade and most of ninth." Edward's answering smile displays two perfect rows of teeth. He's awfully proud of that thing, considering what it stands for. I cover my smile. "Oh, God, it is. You do know that thing single-handedly made you a pariah, don't you?"

"Eh," Edward says with a shrug. "That was bound to happen with or without Warm Sally."

A snort of laughter escapes me. "Oh, right. It has a name."

"You know you missed her."

It's all too easy for Edward to take my mind off the bigger picture, but I can't go on with the day until I tell him how much being bamboozled bothered me. We might as well get the hard part over with now. It's time to take the plunge.

"Do we have a minute to talk?"

He checks his watch. "We have plenty of time. Actually, I need to talk to you, too, but if I miss my appointment again, Anna's going to kill me."

I open the door and gesture for him to come inside. "Again?"

"Yeah, it was supposed to be Wednesday, but you know how hard it is to get across the bridge at lunchtime. I would've never made it back to the office in time. I told her I didn't want to get fired before I've even started." He follows me into the living room and takes a look around. "Nice place. Is it just you here?"

"Yep, just me and the cat." As if on cue, Cubby trots over and squeezes his oversized body through the gap in Edward's legs.

"Hey, buddy." Edward bends down to show him some love, and I steal a moment to gather myself.

"Have a seat. Would you like something to drink? Juice, water, coffee ..." I'm already halfway to the kitchen before he answers.

"No, I'm good, thanks."

In the cool breeze of the refrigerator, I take several cleansing breaths to dispel my nerves. Grabbing a bottle of water for myself, I shut the door and return to Edward. I'm as prepared as I'll ever be. The cat is sprawled across his lap, soaking up every second of Edward's affection.

"Get out of here, Cubby." I swat the cat away and take a seat on the sofa across from Edward.

"Cubby? You're a Cubs fan? Have you been holding out on me, Swan?"

"Guilty." Keeping up with Chicago's sports teams was something I began years ago. After all, I had a vested interest in the windy city after Edward moved there, and it was my pathetic attempt to try and feel closer to him.

For the first time in our lives, we're shrouded in awkwardness with nothing to say. With a sigh, Edward is the first to break through the barrier. "I owe you an apology, Bella."

"Oh?" I ask, focusing on the label of the blue bottle in my hands. My ears are hot, and I wish, for once, the stupid rush of blood didn't completely rule my life. I have zero poker face.

"Yeah, I do, and I should've done it earlier. The way Anna acted in the restaurant last week ... there was no reason for it. I would tell you it's because she just got off a twelve-hour flight, but that would be an excuse, and a really bad one at that. I'm really sorry you had to sit through that."

"Edward, you don't have to apologize for Anna's-"

"Yes, I do. I didn't want this to be a source of contention between any of us; that's not what I intended when I asked for your help. That being said, I'm going to hire a planner to handle the larger tasks."

I wasn't expecting that, but I can't say I'm not relieved. Already, I feel a weight lift from my shoulders. "Are you sure? I said I'd help if you need me to."

"You're my friend, above all else, Bella. I don't want what's supposed to be a happy fucking occasion to change that. I just got you back; I don't want to lose you all over again."

He may have unknowingly crushed my dreams last week, but his veracity is unmistakable. Suddenly, my wallowing, inappropriate fantasies, and doubt fall into perspective all at the same time. We're friends, above all else, like Edward said. My feelings for him may be unrequited, but to be fair, they also went unexpressed for years. It's my own fault for never telling him what was in my heart, and my own bad luck that someone else swooped him up.

My cheeks puff as I exhale. "Well, that's between you and Anna, but I'm happy for you either way." I shrug with half a smile. "I'm just sorry you fired me before I had the chance to earn it by screwing something up."

He quirks a smile in response. "You would've been great; I'm sure of it. Trust me, I'm screwing up plenty on my own. I just needed to get that out of the way. Now, what did you want to talk about?"

There's really no easy way to put it, so I just go for it. "Well, it's about Anna. To say I'm shocked would be a massive understatement. I spent all week trying to figure out why you wouldn't have told me about her sooner. I mean, you and I ... we've never had a problem talking about this sort of thing-girlfriends, boyfriends, bad dates, or in my case, crazy stalkers. But falling in love and getting engaged is so much bigger than any of those things. I guess I'm just confused."

Edward stares at the ground and nods at the floor. He cracks his knuckles. He shrugs. He pulls his hat off and runs a hand through his hair. He's nervous as hell, and nearly every one of his old tics has come out to showcase it. Finally, he meets my eyes, and they're full of the same remorse that's been baffling me for the past couple weeks.

"I wish I had a good excuse to give you, but I don't. Not one that would make sense to you, anyway." I raise my eyebrows, waiting for more, and he rolls his eyes at his own nonsensical reply. "Before I called to tell you I was moving back, it'd been so long since we even talked, and so much had changed so quickly that I didn't know how to bring it up. When we did start talking again, I was so happy to hear from you ... I don't know what the fuck I'm trying to say, here, but I hope I didn't make you angry by surprising you."

The breath I've been holding rushes out in a huff, and I stand up to pace through my confusion. "I was more than surprised, Edward. I was steamrolled. Give a girl a warning-something! I felt so stupid, not knowing anything about Anna when, clearly, she knew about me. It was embarrassing."

"I'm sorry, Bella. I really am. I planned to tell you the night you came to my house, but like a pussy, I choked. You've ... you've always represented a separate world, a separate life for me, and it was so much harder to tell you about Anna than I ever thought it would be." He slides the worn, green sock hat back on his head and shrugs. "That's all I got. I told you it wouldn't make sense, but I am sorry, if that means anything to you."

I slump down onto the arm of the sofa, more confused than ever. "Um, I guess I accept your apology?" I have no idea what I'm even forgiving here.

"Trust me, Bella, you wouldn't want to hear any more than that." And with that cryptic finale, Edward stands. "Well, now that I've sufficiently ruined your day, and probably our friendship, I should get to my appointment."

That goddamn imp is perched on my back with a gun to my head, telling me not to let him walk away. "Wait a minute; not only are you firing me, but you're ditching me, too?"

Edward turns, his hand on the doorknob. "I'm not ditching you. You're off the hook, remember? Why would you want to stand around while I get fitted for a monkey suit, anyway?"

I stand and sling my bag over my chest. "Because, I cleared my schedule for this, Cullen. Have you found a planner yet?"

"No."

"Then you're still on my watch, and I'm going to keep you out of trouble while on said watch. Let's go." I stroll past him, and Edward follows me out. I lock the door, and we take the stairs side-by-side without another word about it.

The sun is shining, and I have to dig in my purse for the sunglasses I so rarely need. The guy on the radio was right; summer is upon us. We walk across the lot, and I stop in surprise when Edward makes a beeline for a gleaming, silver Mercedes convertible.

He makes it all the way to his door, dusting a leaf off the trunk on the way, before he notices that I'm coming along much slower. "What?"

I smile and raise my eyebrows with a shrug. "Nothing at all, Mr. Big Time. I just never pegged you as a Mercedes man. Always took you for a muscle car guy myself."

"I was. I _am,_" he says, affronted. "This was a gift."

"A gift?"

"An engagement present from Anna. A way over-the-top, completely ostentatious engagement present." He cocks half a smile. "That's Anna for you."

I pull open the door and slide into the passenger seat, reaching for my seatbelt. "_Engagement_ present? I didn't even know that was a thing," I say. There's so much more to marriage protocol than I ever knew.

"Me either. I thought she was just supposed to say yes or no," he said, and now that we're out of the sun, I can see how red his face is.

"Jesus. How do you top something like this? Buy her an island?"

Edward laughs and tightens the black belt across his chest. "Well, I would, but I already spent the majority of my life savings getting the Cartier ring she picked out. Besides, Anna's had her own island since she was sixteen. Her dad beat me to it, thank fuck," he says and puts his sunglasses on.

Gunning the engine, he whips the convertible into reverse, screeching out of the parking space with stealth confidence. I want to cover my ears at the sound of the engine, but I'm too busy holding onto my seat for dear life. Edward turns to me with a devilish smirk. "And don't _ever_ underestimate the power of solid German engineering," he says and the engine growls as he exits my complex and catapults us down 53rd street.

Now I remember. Edward drives like a psycho. I can't believe I forgot, or maybe I just expected him to have outgrown it. I'm glad he hasn't. I find myself relaxing into it like I learned to do many years ago. He may be crazy behind the wheel, but he's always careful and fully capable. In fact, his driving is one of the first things that ever turned me on about him.

Four months my elder, Edward was the first to get his license. I was only fifteen years old the first time he gave me the tingles. Years later, when I realized I loved him, speeding down the highway with Edward at the wheel became a nearly orgasmic experience for me. I don't know how I ever managed to hide it from him during those three months before he left, and the thought crosses my mind that I don't know how I'll manage to hide it now.

_Shut up, brain._ I need to put a lid on it before I get myself into trouble. Thank God, I'm no longer under the gun as far as the whole wedding business goes, but exposing myself to it a little at a time might just be the best thing for me. Maybe, the more I see Edward happily in love, the less I'll have the urge to tell him about my unacceptable, inappropriate feelings. A girl can hope.

Edward taps a large screen on the dash, and it only takes a second for me to place the song. I lay my head back and close my eyes as "Laid" by James blares from the speakers. Flying across the bridge, we all sing along-me, Edward, and my constant companion, the imp.

The little bastard.

Chapter End Notes:

Thanks for reading, guys! I truly appreciate all the support, as I stated earlier.

Big tackle hug for my beta, Alice's White Rabbit. She makes everything all sparkly. And I can't forget my VB, devilsgenie. She gives great feedback, and she's a pretty reliable sounding board for my ever-changing ideas.

Again, the song is "The Sound of Settling" by Death Cab for Cutie, and I think it's pretty perfect for where we're at.

**Before I forget, one of you lovely peaches nominated The Space Between for fic of the week at The Lemonade Stand! I'm so excited to see the story being recognized! Voting ends tonight (Tuesday), so if you're feeling extra generous, stop by and vote! Here's the link:

2013/09/meet-poll-what-were-reading-in-tls-this_ ?zx=20ce27b996735efa

See you next time!


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